[MrTorez]

Well my first opinion, and you may be offended by this, but I think your mum needs to give her head a wobble. What mother gets annoyed at having to go help her daughter who is unwell and in need of help!

You should at the minimum make an appointment with your doctor to go over what happened and to be checked out and if it happens again, contact 111 and if they feel you need A&E then they’ll send an ambulance so wait for it.

 

Regarding your son, speak to him. Has he said he was scared or worried? Talk him through what happened, that from time to time people will feel unwell and that he did the right thing in calling your mum for help. Tell him you feel fine now and thank him for looking out for you. Kids arent stupid, like everyone else they appreciate honesty and if it does happen again, he wont be freaked out or scared and he’ll know what to do.

[MrTorez]

Hello – normally I’d be all for the dad seeing the children at least 50% of the time but I think from what I’ve read here limiting the dads visits and for them to be supervised is the right thing to do. I’d maybe say that the visits could be increased in frequently including overnight stays and eventually unsupervised visits could be arranged in the future if he gets himself help and stays clean. Honestly though, I think the only way that’s going to stick is if you get a child arrangement order.

If I flip it and my ex was a drug using/selling, abusive and inconsistent person, I wouldn’t want my children anywhere near her unsupervised. The days/hours would be set and if she missed them then she would have to wait until the next set date/time. I’d make sure she was fully aware that if she consistently missed visits that it would be a detriment to the child and she would be cut off eventually.

 

I thankfully didn’t have to fight to see my kids as we agreed 50/50, and although me ex has still tried to be controlling over them my fight was over the finances. So I cant really talk about the process of a child arrangement order but hopefully other members that have obtained one can. All I can give you is my parent opinion and I would 100% agree with you setting conditions.

[MrTorez]

Hello – I obviously know nothing about your situation, child arrangements with the father, is the father reliable etc but I know if that was me and I found out my ex had sorted a friend to look after my children rather than asking me and therefore giving me more time to spend with them, I’d be unhappy/annoyed too. There would also be the question of who is the friend, do I know them, are they trusted, and are they competent at looking after children?

 

Like I say, I don’t know your situation and I don’t know the law (unless there’s a court agreement in place I doubt you’ve broken any laws) so I’m not saying what you’ve done is right or wrong, I’m only giving my single dad point of view, a dad who would love to have his kids as much as possible.

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