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  • #11846 Report

    Galee74
    Participant

    The policr have been useless and totally biased towards ‘mum’ throughout to be honest. For instance once she threw me down the stairs and i had light bruising there and then, and i asked to press charges, they said they would then arrest ME for breach of the peace (because she claimed that…it wasnt true) if i decided to go ahead with pressing charges: basically because they couldnt be bothered with the paperwork and to try and scare me off. I’ve NEVER been in trouble with the police so i didnt take it further.

    And this had happened for more or less every time of 4times ive rang them…so not a lot i can do and no evidence other than the logs themselves, as she will always say the opposite and was VERY clever and always rang them immediately afterwards and made up lies about me

    #11837 Report

    Galee74
    Participant

    Thanks for the advice everyone, no i can’t cut back or save more than i am as very occasionally, about twice a year, i am so borderline i have to use food banks, due to previous debt i no longer have, an overdraft isnt an option. I will have to do the miam again no doubt so i am saving for that and or 1 mediation session to try and sort this and all the whilst saving as much as i can, but it will take months and months!

    my concern is next month onwards she will stop contact as she will say im now not paying her maintenance (as im using that money…my only spare money…to save up for mediation and court). And there’s not much i can do about that…:( my family are generally poor and she’s turned half of them against me with her manipulation. She’s that bad 99% of my family will have nothing to do with her whatsoever.

    family lives etc helpful but again i can’t get legal aid as no definitive proof of her years of physical and emotional abuse, manipulation and bullying of me…so I’d have to pay for everyrhing: i’d get help but not much help for someone so poor. And a 2nd nightime job isnt an option as she’s so u predictable: she can just turn up with my son sometimes, or even sometimes disowns him and i have to take time off work (and lose money for doing so). Its a viscious circle!

    #11800 Report

    Galee74
    Participant

    Thanks so much for the advice you two: she today turned up unannounced with my son! Proves what a game player she is: so i have him until tommorow night as it’s the school hols and im at work monday morning.

    We went to mediation but they said the miam was over a year ago so id need another: is this correct? To me it sounded like they just wanted another £65 or whatever it costed out of me …?

    as for the rest, she abused and emotionally and physically abused for years but no charges, just police log numbers, so no solid proof. (She is VERY clever and manipulative).

    I know i won’t be entitled to full legal aid as i ‘earn’ £1,100 a month but after rent and bills im left with around £30 to myself which soon goes….but on paper it basically says £1,100-£500 rent leaves me with £600 a month ‘disposable income’ which is of course rubbish, as it doesn’t take into account council tax, maintenance, food, gas, electric, tv licence, water, work travel expenses etc!

    so i’m kinda in limbo: the second i don’t pay her maintenance she stops me seeing my son and it would take me months and months just to save up for 1 mediation session, miam and 1 court hearing…:(

    i’m thinking about self representing but i’ve had a look at the documents and it seems SO complicated and i wouldnt know how to answer half the questions? Any advice? Simply cannot afford any solicitors or barristers at all. And this is all without counting for emergencies, birthdays etc. (It’s also my sons birthday next pay day AND my fridge freezer is on the fritz 🙁 )

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