Posted 18 April 2019
Rachel is a single parent to her three year-old daughter, Faith. She was first signposted to Gingerbread while pregnant and has used many of our services ever since. Here, she writes about her amazing journey...
Posted 7 September 2018
Amber from MTV’s Teen Mom UK is a single mum to her three-year old son, Brooklyn, and recently chatted to us about her experiences of being a young single parent.
How did you feel when you first found out that you were going to be a mum?
I was very nervous. I was quite worried, obviously, about the future and stuff like that. I was with my ex-partner at the time – we were in a bit of a bad place, so it was also a case of thinking: ‘Do I want to be with this boy for the rest of my life?’
I was working and I was in college, so I had all of that to think about, but I also started thinking of all the little things. If we went out, I was always the mum of the group, and because I was working and I was in college, I always felt like I was a bit more mature than all of my friends. I’ve always classed myself as an adult, even when I was 16. I felt like I was ready, so that’s why we made the decision to keep Brooklyn. As time went on, that’s when I got more into it – like, ‘Oh my god, I’m having a baby!’
It was very nerve-wracking, but very exciting at the same time. I don’t regret any decision I’ve made in the past three years with myself and Brooklyn.
What would you say is the best part of being a mum?
I think everything! Every day is new and you make new memories, even little things. When you see your child walk for the first time, crawl for the first time, their first words, their first Christmas – these are all memories that I’ve built.
I also think that it’s having someone who’s yours. He’s my child. Getting to be a role-model means I try to give him the best life I possibly can.
What challenges have you found to being a mum?
Brooklyn is now three – I call it ‘three-nager’. People say, ‘Oh, he’s out of his Terrible Twos now. Lucky you,’ but I’m like, ‘No, I’m not lucky.’ He’s still going through those stages where one day, he can be the cutest little boy ever. He’s playful, and he’s like ‘Mummy, can I have a sweet?’ Then, the next day, he’s a little monster.
It’s like I’m learning, not just him. It’s trying to juggle everything at the same time: work, a child, and I live on my own. Everything’s challenging when you become a mother, especially when you’re younger.
It can sometimes be difficult when you’re raising a child by yourself. What advice would you give to other people in that situation?
Probably just have patience – it’s such hard work. I stress out so much because I think: ‘Am I doing this right? Am I doing that right? Am I being judged?’
So many thoughts go through my head, but I just think that as long as I’ve got patience, and as long as I know that I’m happy with everything I do with Brooklyn, I feel more confident and comfortable with being a mum.