[SingleT]

My brother once gave me some sound advice about my mother in law. Kill her with kindness. It was brilliant as it showed her up for who she is and no one could ever come back and say yeah but she did that because you did such and such. I now do the same with my ex. It drives him mad as he expected me to kick off when I found out he’d had an affair and then he could have said see that’s why I left her. It’s quite easy to stay calm as my son is a lot older so I don’t want him to see that side. That’s what my best friends are for. I’ve text my son to say that if he moans about how many hugs I give him I’ll unplug his xbox lol.

Enjoy your girl’s birthday. You’ve got this!

T x

[SingleT]

Thx Mark

After a cry when he went, I’ve had a brilliant week spent with people I love doing fun things. It’s felt weird not having to think of anyone but myself, but it’s done me the world of good. Now I’m ready to get my boy back and get the next chapter sorted.

T x

[SingleT]

Wowzer! You have been busy. All sounds positive in terms of knowing what to do next. I definitely thinking being in control of the situation helps.

I’m using this week while my son is on holiday with his dad and gf to recharge my batteries as from next week it will be full on solicitors and stuff for the house sale.

I hope you manage to enjoy this time with your children.  If you feel your positive pants slipping just come back on here x

[SingleT]

Hi Mark.

It’s so painful when you find out. But from personal experience it helped me as it gave me a reason, and also it meant I would never go back there. I hope you get something positive out of it.

aounds like you have a plan of action and that will help you stay focused. Keep us updated and good luck with it all x

[SingleT]

No idea why it’s come up with the font size thing. Sorry! Hope you can read through it and what I say makes sense!

[SingleT]

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>Hi Mark</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>Sorry to hear what you’re going through. It is a horrible time, and more so because it’s happening right under your nose.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>First thing tomorrow I would get an hour’s free legal advice. Even if a solicitor says there’s a charge, question it. They usually give you an hour free as it may result in business for them.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>I would document her behaviour. It’s amazing how much you forget when you are sorting childcare / home / work / life. Dates, times etc and what impact is has on the children.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>Speak to your boss. Ask for support. Whether it’s a change in working pattern, or working from home (if you can) in the evening when the children are in bed.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>And as hard as it is, if you speak to her about her behaviour don’t make it about how you feel as she won’t care. Always make it about the impact on the children.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>Maybe also document childcare arrangements you currently have and share it with her. Any deviation or reluctance on her part is more evidence. Sad as it is, but it does help.</span>

<span class=”s1″ style=”font-family: ‘.SFUIText’; font-size: 17pt;”>Take care of yourself and keep us updated x</span>

[Author]

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