[RB1203]

Oh my gosh I also paid for my divorce 😂 I also do receive the £7 a week that is taken from his benefits. But he works cash in hand and lords it over me.

Thank you for your message and I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I dealt with a lot of female friends during that marriage. All his ‘friends’ which was a another reason I ended it with him. I forgot to add that he also takes my key and then I message for it back and he says yes but never returns it.

Tomorrow I am starting my son off at a child minder I met once but have spoken to before. I am so sad I don’t get to give him a proper settling in period. It just sucks that the kids will always get hurt whether I try or not. Wish us luck, he is 1 and a half.

Also never feel sad he is starting a new family, just remember when it goes tits up, she will probably come to you first 😂 nasty people eventually get found out

[RB1203]

I hope I can, let’s see how this week goes.

[RB1203]

Thank you, so lucky to have found some childcare for this week. I am grateful to have a job I can escape to. You are right, plenty of other things he can do with the children.

[RB1203]

Hello there

Please don’t allow this man’s rejection destroy the time you have with your newborn. I am speaking from experience, my last child was not seen by his father until month 5 over WhatsApp video call. The nights can be excruciating and it’s also heavy to deal with a child and heartbreak of your own and that of your newborn. What helped me because this was my last baby, was to cherish being busy in my own world watching my newborn grow and of course i was sad deeply because his father never saw him and I didn’t know if he ever would. But eventually he did so there is hope.

For now please try focus on hr to hr, day by day. Especially with a newborn, be gentle with yourself. Don’t even give him a second thought don’t let him ruin your beautiful memories. Also for somebody to reject the child and still surface talk is very odd. Don’t even entertain them at this point because they sound like they like riling you up.

Whilst there is a chance he won’t see the baby ever, there is hope he will. And if he doesn’t, you’ll end up so used to it and better things and opportunities will come along.

Lastly, you have nothing to feel guilty about, it is not a mother’s job to ensure the father is present for his child, we can only leave the door ajar.

[RB1203]

Thank you very much for your message. I came on here so I don’t lose my mind with all the things I get told I am and do so badly.

I guess I also wanted to know if we can’t figure out an arrangement between us because he doesn’t have a fixed address, have any financial input, supportive friends and family etc. This would be entirely his responsibility to ensure he has a safe place for the kids to take to away from my home if he wanted to see them. These types of arrangements can be obtained from family court which again would be his responsibility. I don’t want a angry man at my door again 3 months down the line when we are finally in a good routine for him to be here again (this is about the 100th time we are here) I want some kind of record to prove he isn’t fussed about the kids more about ruining our routine and happiness with false hope and promises.

I also feel like I want to discuss the particular things he has done to me just to get it off me.

[Author]

Posts