[PS22]

Hi, I was in a similar situation but I’ll be honest yours sounds much more aggressive than mine (though when things were clearly going south and arguments were occurring I decided to close down, keep quiet until I was ready to leave which took 2 years).

Its a hard one for me to advise on because I made the conscious decision that I had no interest in getting into another relationship but instead focussed on what I needed to do and my daughter. There were two ‘step kids’ in the mix who I had (and still have) a good, positive relationship with.

When I came to leave I was terrified, thoughts like ‘how is my daughter going to react, will she hate me, will she resent me, what about the other two…will they feel abandoned’.

My personal advice is, if your instincts are telling you the ‘new’ relationship is not healthy then follow your gut and get out. I know how hard it is to form relationships when you have children. You struggle to get the time, feel guilty for leaving your child with a stranger. But for me the following your instincts and ensuring that you and your children are in a healthy situation is more important.

The pressures are extremely hard to handle and I totally understand your feelings of depression but going deeper into an unhealthy relationship will only make those feelings ten times worse.

I hope that helps.

[PS22]

One question I do have is have you had someone look over your CV to determine if its doing you any favours in your search for a new job? A common issue many people have is their CV doesn’t reflect the person adequately to ensure you are getting decent job opportunities.

[PS22]

If you want a chat then I’m available.

[PS22]

Heya. Similar situation. Single father but share my daughters time with her mum 50/50. I left my ex in the October year before Covid hit and am finding myself feeling very lonely. I had a large group of friends from work but they are an hour away so not local and lost the few local friends in the circumstances change (and Covid).

Desperately trying to get a local social circle.

[PS22]

Thank you for the information. It did really worry me and I’ve got no concerns around the older children or her mum. In fact I do still maintain a good relationship with the children and their mother (better now than it was).

[PS22]

Oddly my circumstances have/had some similarities in that I’m a man who became part of family in 2014 that had two children already (boy then 3 and a girl 6). My female partner then became pregnant and gave birth to my daughter. From the moment of my daughters birth I felt disrespect/ignored and generally treated with only regards to me performing functions for the family. After 5 years of trying to gain some level of consideration, I finally left. I now share 50/50 of my daughters time and care.

I’m still yet to feel like I’m being given respect and concerned over what is said to my daughter in my absence.

[Author]

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