[Pennyroyal]

Newmum84 Thank you for your response, I know how hard it is, it sounds like you have gone through a similar situation to me. If you ever need to talk feel free to send me a pm, it certainly takes its toll on you as a mother.

 

Peachy, again, thank you. I have taken a lot from your message. It’s given me new angles to consider.
So how far in advance does your ex tell you he wants to see his son? And do you not tell your son until daddy actually turns up for him? It must be hard for you with respect for planning things. If you have plans with your son do you just tell your ex sorry but you can’t today?

[Pennyroyal]

Thank you very much for your reply Ishtar, you’ve certainly given me a few things to think about.

[Pennyroyal]

Hi dannii009

Thank you for your reply and sorry that you have an ex partner who feels that way about your daughter. I hope you have some support as know it’s not easy on your own.

Thank you for sharing your last paragraph, that’s been of some help, yes, it’s hard to explain that to a 4 year old.
There has been periods when my ex has kept the contact up but it’s always when something goes wrong in his life it’s like he just drops all of his responsibilities. He says he wants to be in his life but he never does anything with his son, spends very little quality time with him, most of the time he just takes him to his mums and leaves him there rather than have him at his place. He will go on nights out when it’s his night with him etc. I just don’t understand it.
I wish he would just step up and be a dad.

[Pennyroyal]

Hi sirtobi

We have been tried mediation….he doesn’t comply to the arrangement.
We have tried coming to a mutually convenient arrangement together, he couldn’t stick to this either.

So you think I should let my son wait and be excited to see him all day for him to just not turn up, not text, not answer any texts or phonecalls? No explanation given at all.
Seeing how upset he was at this and the age he’s at now, I fear it’s only going to get worse, and am unsure what mental damage the rejection could do to him.

It’s honestly so difficult to know what to do for the best but like I say, this pattern of behaviour has been happening since our son was born.
All I’ve ever wanted is for him to step up and be the dad my son deserves. I don’t understand how it’s so hard. One day out of 14, that is all. I am his mum every day of the week, every second of the day.

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