[Irzs]

Hiya, so sorry for your circumstances!

There’s an increasing number of companies that offers flexible working. I found a company which allows me to work full time, remotely and flexibly, meaning that I don’t go to the office, and I decide which hours to work e.g. I can go to gym at 10am, finish work at 3pm etc. as long as I do all my work. I definitely encourage you to find companies like this.  I’m a single parent of a toddler with no family members around. My job gives me financial stability and flexibility with childcare. Also you should be able to have urgent sick leave under the law. It’s not impossible to find jobs like this. LinkedIn and Gov Find a Job has lots of vacancies. Good luck.

Have you talked to your health worker about your situation and difficulties? I think they should be able to direct you to the right expertise to solve this issue. Your solicitor can mostly only give you legal advice (e.g. explaining your positions and options under the law). Has he/she explained the best position you can get out of your current circumstances? Your solicitor should give constructive advice such as recommending what you can do to mitigate your loss, rather than just saying that you’re screwed. Get the client letter from them and clearly understand your choice and situation. If you’re not sure or happy about their advice then just go back to their law firm for further explanation.

Also I’d say finding someone in a similar position would be ideal – just like what you’re doing now! Good luck! if things doesn’t work out after you tried everything (e.g. solicitor, health worker, charities) , definitely write to your local MP to get support.

lastly if it makes you feel better: I’m 25 year old single with a child. I can’t claim any government benefit because of my immigration status. I don’t have any saving. Struggled to get employed cause employers have to pay extra to the government to hire me, plus I don’t have work experience. But things eventually worked out for me. Hope things will work well for you, too!

 

[Irzs]

Thanks Danni. He’s more of a verbal/ mental abuser who likes to shout, throw things, walk away from the house and control my life such as forcing me to quit job or not accept job offers. But he did throw stuff onto my face in one occasion (which resulted in bruise on my eye) and pulled my hair during another. My child got very scared when he shouts and throw things. Visit centre sounds like a good option I’ll definitely call the helpline thank you

[Irzs]

Thanks, I’m glad you find it helpful and fingers crossed it’ll work for you. Yes I agree that things can get hard. Let’s also believe that things can eventually get better after we work a little bit harder.

 

[Irzs]

Maybe start with GP and health worker? They should have lots of resource. I recently splited with my abusive ex. The police referred me to the domestic violence service support. Here’s some resource from gov.Uk https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help  
hope that’s helpful. Wish you all the best!

[Irzs]

Hi ya here’s some resource from government website https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help#get-a-court-order-to-protect-you-or-your-child

https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help

[Irzs]

Hi there, definitely speak to GP, health worker and uni tutor. I was in second year uni when I got accidentally pregnant. They are able to make adjustments in uni and tell you where you can get benefits. I developed depression and anxiety so I was entitled to get disability student allowance where the government pay for my reasonable adjustments such as equipment and even note taking softwares to help my study. My baby’s  dad became abusive after I had the baby. Based on my experience, If the partner is abusive, it’s easier to take care of the baby without him. When I called the police (due to baby’s dad’s abusive behaviour, the police told me that there’s free living places that’s offered to domestic abuse victims. Also legally speaking your baby’s dad will be responsible for baby’s living costs if you separate with him. Do reach out to get help! All the best!

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