[Devoted Dad]

I felt exactly the same anxiety as you. Try to stay calm.

I have since had a reply from the CMS. They have written to my MP and admitted they are using the incorrect figure but insist I go to a HMCTS Tribunal to appeal. This process involves the RP and for fear of having to fight again to see my children due to financial motives once they know I am appealing the amount I pay.

I have resigned myself to paying the higher amount and tell myself it’s all for the children (despite knowing that it isn’t). Keep doing the right thing by your children and ultimately one day they will thank you for it.

The system is broken and you hear a multitude of horror stories on a regular basis from many people. I am not sure it will ever change, they may reinvent the system in a few years to something more archaic and broken with it being a government organisation!

Send me a PM if you ever need someone to vent to who understands!

[Devoted Dad]

Hi,

The system is a joke and not fit for purpose as you suggest.

I have had many failings with them over the last year. I had a private arrangement with my ex however she demanded more money, I said I couldn’t afford any more. I then get the CMS letter based on no overnight shared care which wasn’t correct as I did indeed have both my daughters although there had been a tendency for them to ‘not want to come’ following the CMS involvement! Cue an expensive (circa £12k) court process which ordered we go back to the arrangement we had previously.

I have recently had my annual review stating I earn £7k a year more than I do and does not take into account any pension contributions that I make either. When I tried to submit a change / appeal it was rejected as the  incorrect review figure was less than 25% different from the incorrect figure. It went to Mandatory Reconsideration as was again rejected based on the 25% different rule.

I have complained via my Local MP as that was the only way to get a response when dealing with a previous issue but am yet to hear anything from the CMS/DWP.

I have and always will provide for my children however I am being forced to pay an inflated amount based on gross earnings and not taking into consideration any of my outgoings. I pay my maintenance of £600+ per month plus I buy them things as required. My mortgage has just gone up £300pm & my maintenance over £60pm and I am struggling. We as paying parents are held to ransom!

Meanwhile, I have to make payments based on incorrect figures to avoid the threats of enforcement action from the CMS. And my daughters mother pleads poverty whilst swanning around in designer goods! Talk about a sucker punch! Like you I am fairly certain that my payments cover the majority of the children’s costs.

The system will never be reviewed or revised. It’s set out to punish the majority based on the failings of the minority of paying parents who don’t pay.

I am now just holding out for the next 13 years until my children are old enough for me to get rid of the CMS!

Stay strong any try to stay positive!

[Devoted Dad]

Thanks for your replies!

I stuck to my guns and we’ve had a couple of weekends now without the puppies. My eldest will occasionally say she misses them but I reassure her they will be fine and she will see them in a couple of days which has worked well. They are not my responsibility, she gives me enough grief about how I look after our children so it would be even worse if the dogs came along too!

It’s 100% been done as another tactic to get in between me but hey. I just keep working on being the best daddy and person I can be and leave her to it.

Also found out last week that her boyfriend of 4 weeks comes round once/twice a week to stay etc. which I think is inappropriate with it being so soon and I would have expected at least a message to discuss introducing new partners etc!

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