Michael, the son of a single parent shares their story and why Gingerbread groups are so valuable.

“I grew up with my mum, just the two of us. She was a lone parent, and she worked so hard to keep everything together. We moved a lot when I was young, sometimes because of money, sometimes because she wanted to move further away from my dad.

I often felt that my mum was always under a kind of latent amount of stress all the time. She was doing everything, working, paying bills, looking after me, dealing with family issues, and I think that rubbed off on me. Even as a kid, I could feel that pressure in the air.

But one of the best things we had during that time was Gingerbread. My mum was part of a Gingerbread group when I was little, and later she ran her own as well as worked for them. Every Saturday we’d go to a community centre in North London with a few toys and snacks, and the place would just come alive.

There were about six or seven families, sometimes more, all single parents and their kids. The parents would sit together, talking, sharing advice and experiences. The kids, like me, would run around, play games, and eat biscuits. It was noisy and chaotic, but in the best possible way.

Looking back, I can see how important that was. My mum wasn’t alone anymore. She had other parents around her who understood what she was going through, people she could lean on, people who could help her with things like childcare advice or job opportunities. It was a space where everyone helped each other.

For me, it made a huge difference too. Because I spent so much time with other single-parent families, being from a lone parent household felt normal. I never felt different or like something was missing.

When I got older, I realised how rare that was. At school, I started to notice the divide, kids from two-parent families who had more money, nicer clothes, bigger houses. But because of Gingerbread, I didn’t feel out of place. I understood that families come in all shapes and sizes.

If my mum hadn’t had that group, I think things would’ve been a lot harder and lonelier. She was carrying so much on her own, and those groups gave her friendship and support. For me, they gave me community, people who understood what my life looked like.

My mum passed away in 2023. She was very fortunate to have been part of Gingerbread, both as a parent and as someone who went on to help other families through her own group. Those groups gave her support and friendship at a time when she was doing everything on her own, and they gave both of us a community we wouldn’t have had otherwise. Without Gingerbread, I don’t know where we’d have ended up. I was basically a conscious human from about three years old, and we were already in a Gingerbread group. It was a huge part of my life.

Our society isn’t really built for single parents. There isn’t enough understanding or support, and too many people are left to figure things out on their own. That’s why organisations like Gingerbread are so important, they step in where the system doesn’t. They give people advice, connection, and community.

Those groups shaped me in ways I didn’t realise at the time. They made me comfortable in my own skin, and they showed me that it’s okay to ask for help. I think that’s one of the most powerful things Gingerbread gives people, the sense that you’re not alone.

For my mum, it gave her hope.
For me, it gave me a childhood where I never felt alone.

It’s hard to imagine my life without it. I think it would’ve been a lot lonelier.”