Plan contact arrangements early
Try to plan ahead and agree on where your child will spend their time during the holidays. Sorting out the schedule in advance can help make time apart smoother and less emotional for everyone. If your children are older, having a conversation about the holiday plans can help them feel more involved and in control.
While it can be challenging, staying calm and respectful with your child’s other parent will make the whole holiday period much less stressful.
And remember, as one parent put it, “Christmas is more than just one day.” If you’re not able to be with your child on Christmas Day itself, there will still be plenty of other opportunities to enjoy quality time together throughout the season.
Create new traditions
Families celebrate Christmas in so many different ways, and if you’ve recently separated, it can feel tough to continue with old traditions.
One of the best pieces of advice from other single parents is to create new traditions—and with them, make new memories:
- Make Christmas Eve extra special with a cozy pyjama party. Put on a festive movie, snuggle up on the sofa, and enjoy your favorite treats.
- Mix things up by letting your children choose some new decorations for the tree—or even make your own! Crafting snowflake paper chains can be a fun way to get into the Christmas spirit.
- Food is a big part of Christmas, so why not let the kids decide what to have for dinner? Baking cakes, mince pies, and gingerbread together is bound to be a fun (and slightly messy) activity.
- New traditions don’t have to be expensive. A simple one could be putting 50p a day into a jar for the 12 days of Christmas, then using the money to buy a gift for someone else. It’s a great way to teach kids about saving and giving.
Creating new family traditions can be a wonderful way to build lasting memories that you and your children will treasure long after the decorations are packed away. It doesn’t have to be complicated or costly—just something different that you can enjoy together.
“On Christmas Eve we look at a tracking website www.noradsanta.org to see where Santa is. Of course, Santa won’t come if they’re not asleep so if they’re still up when he gets to France, they know they’re risking it!”
“Our favourite tradition is a homemade advent calendar. I make a new one each year and include activities we can do together such as crafts, ice skating, having a proper hot chocolate with all the trimmings, seeing the local Christmas lights or eating dessert before dinner!”
Make a budget and stick to it
We’ve all been there—shop windows are filled with shiny new toys that everyone needs, the kids are dropping hints left and right, your colleagues are planning a fancy 3-course Christmas meal, and you’re left wondering how you’ll afford it all.
The key is to be realistic about what you can spend and avoid relying on credit cards.
For adult family and friends, Secret Santa is a fun way to give gifts without breaking the bank. Plus, having just one gift to buy makes things a lot less stressful.
Setting a spending limit for the children’s presents with their other parent can also help prevent the holiday competition that sometimes sneaks in.
Planning ahead is another great way to feel more in control and reduce stress. MoneyHelper has some helpful tips for saving money over the holidays, along with a budget planner you can download to stay on track.
Get creative with the presents
You can’t buy happiness, no matter what the ads might say. To keep your spending in check, focus on giving smaller, more thoughtful gifts and fun stocking fillers.
One parent shared a great idea—making your own selection boxes! Look for deals on your children’s favorite chocolates and wrap them up individually for them to enjoy on Christmas Day.
Don’t stress if your child’s other parent can afford more expensive gifts. What really matters is that your kids have a joyful and memorable time during the holidays. It’s the time you spend together that they’ll remember the most.
So, try to resist the urge to go into debt for presents that may only be used for a short time.
Dawn likes to include her kids in the Christmas shopping, helping them make budget-friendly choices while still keeping things fun.
“When it comes to your child wanting an expensive toy that you know is rubbish but they see as great because the TV ad makes them look great, the simple answer is to take them to the toy shop and let them see the reality.
We’re doing a lot of homemade pressies this year. We’ve made chutney using discounted fruit and vegetables. We save empty jam and sauce jars, which my children decorate with stickers and ribbons. My eldest is also having a go at making candles.”
Don’t forget about yourself
It’s easy to get caught up in focusing on your child’s needs and forget about your own during Christmas. But this time should be about you enjoying yourself too. You won’t be able to please everyone all the time, and there will be moments when you need to put your foot down and decide what’s best for you.
If you’re spending Christmas on your own, it might feel a bit strange. Make sure to take care of yourself. Many parents say their top tip is to avoid putting pressure on yourself—just do what you feel able to.
Most importantly, remember that while things might feel tough now, it will get easier. So, take some time to treat yourself in whatever way you can.
How would you like to spend the day? You could have a relaxing pamper session before your kids return, or spend some time catching up with friends and family. There’s no right or wrong way to spend it—just do what feels best for you.
