Worried about Christmas plans

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  • #43985 Report

    Littleproblems
    Participant

    My ex and I have been separated over a year now and things are very strained, we communicate via email or text only (at his insistence as he ‘can’t stand the sight of me’). Last Christmas our 7 and 3 year old spent Christmas Day with me and Boxing Day with him and his family but this year it has been assumed by him that he would get Christmas Day and me Boxing Day. I know this is a fair arrangement but my 7 yr old daughter does not want to spend the day with him. Obviously my son is so young he does what his sister does. I have suggested in an email to him that as they are so young still and my daughter has voiced her worries about being away from me the whole day that perhaps we can share the day as all families live within easy driving distance of each other. He replied basically saying no and wants them for the whole Christmas Day. Now I very much listen to my daughter with regards to her wants and wishes but would I be wrong to say that no, sorry they are with me again for the most of the day but will see you for a few hours?

    My daughter suffers with anxiety and I do not want to make things worse. She does not have a great relationship with him and it has emerged that he is emotionally abusing her (name calling, telling her shes lazy, ungrateful etc) so I am having to deal with that at the moment as well. (BTW he was emotionally and verbally abusing me which is why I ended it so I have no qualms about believing her about this)

    What would you do??

    Comments and advice welcome!

    #44053 Report

    BluebirdSue
    Participant

    Hi there

    I was wondering is this a legal arrangement or something you arrange yourselves?

    If he is insisting on having the children on Christmas Day then maybe you could have your Christmas together a few days earlier? 😀

     

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