Wife of 27 years left us.
21 January 2018 at 6:44 pm #7003
My Wife of 27 years left us last thursday night while I was at work. No explination only a note with “Im leaving”. My Wife left our thirteen year old daughter who has autism in bed asleep. My wife texted me at work at 20.00 “ok love hows work xxx” (I do a 2.00pm to 10.00pm shift at a large hospital). I came home from work and found the note and the shock was absolute. My wife did not contact my Daughter for over twenty four hours. You can imagine the terrible state we were in during this time. This was so out of character for my wife I even phoned the police to report her missing. forty eight hours later the police said they had found her safe and well which was a relief. It has now been a few days and the picture is becoming a little clearer. My wife found someone on the internet and left. My daughter and myself are both devistated. I joined gingerbread and thought I would just put our story out there. I wonder how many Mums and Dads have been through similar experiances. Thanks for reading.21 January 2018 at 7:35 pm #7006
Hi, how awful for you and your daughter. Sending hugs. My ex left after 23 years (we weren’t married, he never wanted to, but he married a family friend within a year). He left me with our 4 children, one of them with health problems. Let’s just say, he was a confidence trickster and most of my money was gone by the time he left. I now realise he had financially abused me for years.
I know it’s hard but try not to feel too down. At first I just plodded on taking each day as it came.21 January 2018 at 7:57 pm #7007
It will be difficult to come to terms with because the people we love have let us down so badly. Just be strong and that your life has changed dramatically . I don’t understand why they do this but being human makes.people very very selfish..just look after each other as the road is slow and painful .21 January 2018 at 7:59 pm #7008
I am so sorry to hear this . I have just split up from my partner after 27 years, different circumstances but wow where do you start after all that time together . It’s a minefield . And I can’t give advice as struggling myself but you are not alone . Take one day at a time and try not to think too far ahead . Sorry I am not much help but will listen anytime . Take care of yourself and your daughter22 January 2018 at 5:35 pm #7024
Thanks for your kind reply. Glad to know there are so many good people out there, to offer advice. Take care.22 January 2018 at 5:38 pm #7025
Thanks for the kind advice. I am just trying to stay busy and do all the practical things that need to be done at the moment.22 January 2018 at 5:46 pm #7026
Thanks for the kind words. It so good to know that I am not alone.22 January 2018 at 7:03 pm #7027
Hi my husband walked out on me and my children last Tuesday after 23 years together. One day we was happy family unit then the next total devastation!
i can’t offer any advice as I don’t know how to deal with it myself but I’m looking for support like you x22 January 2018 at 7:16 pm #7028
It’s so hard to understand why are partners just give up on us so easily . My partner and I have split up last may . I am still struggling with the situation I feel like I am living in limbo . I am staying with my poor Dad with 2 kids . This is not how I expected my life to go at my age (46) I feel I have given him my best years . Our future was nearly ours to ,enjoy our old age together .now I have to begin all over again and I don’t think I want to !!!!!22 January 2018 at 7:27 pm #7030
I was also looking forward growing old with him as my kids are 23,19,15 and 9 I am 41 so when my youngest is old enough to look after himself I will still be young.
i don’t think I could do it again or even think about it22 January 2018 at 7:48 pm #7033
My now ex husband walked out on me and my 2 kids last febuarywe had been together 15 years I divorced him on adultery as he left for some young girl that he worked with he’s with her still now. He is pure evil now he verbally abuses me along with his gf and is very manipulative but now I’m glad he left as was his 2nd affair whilst with me she’s welcome to be his next victim.
At first it seems impossible and u think that you will never be able to cope but I’m doing well now I work I run a house and I’m bringing up two boys so does make you stronger in the end.
He does still see them but is very selfish if something happening he wants to do or go to on a day and time that he supposed to be seing the boys then thats first and boys get let down.
Small steps and take each day as it comes for now.
Take care22 January 2018 at 8:32 pm #7036
Thank you24 January 2018 at 9:01 pm #7087
So sorry to hear this. Hope you are coping
with your daughter ok.
I think there are so many of us that have been in a similar situation. The only advise I can give is use to this to go get all the things you couldn’t get or do when you were married. I use my seperation as a new lease of life almost.28 January 2018 at 9:38 pm #7205
My ex walked out nearly three years ago he had an affair with a girl at work, said he couldn’t do family life anymore our children were 18 (it was our son’s 18th birthday) and nearly 12. I was devastated we has been together for 22 years and I had no idea he was unhappy, I don’t to this day think he was I believe that he thought the grass was greener etc. His new GF couldn’t have children and they set up home together, leaving me to fund our son at Uni whilst he had lavish holidays with the GF.
Life is so hard at first when it comes as such a shock, my advice is take each day as it comes, treat each situation as it arises and take as much time as you need to adjust. Things really do have a way of working out…they have too and I agree with comments above, it really does make you a stronger better person. My son is nearly through Uni now and I am so proud of him and proud of myself to for supporting him with no help from his dad.
My two are nearly 21 and nearly 15 now, I feel like I can start again with a life for myself (Although where to find it I am hoping is on another forum!!!) my ex on the other hand well………… all changed for him last year when suddenly his GF miraculously became pregnant he is now living in a flat with a 4 month old baby and is literally starting all over again with family life……28 January 2018 at 10:37 pm #7208
Mbf123. Reading your post has given me hope.