Where to begin?

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  • #13954 Report


    Good Morning All,

    Just wanted some friendly advice if possible!

    The last few weeks my husband and I have separated.

    Currently we are still sharing our home which is so difficult but he has made his intentions very clear that I am the one to leave with our 8 month old baby as the house comes with his job and I have no right to be there.

    He is unwilling to have my son for me to continue working and living in central London i can not afford childcare so I have no option but to quit my job to look after my baby boy.

    feeling incredibly lonely, petrified and Really struggling to see a way out for my little boy, with nowhere to live, no money and no family at all for support.

    Any friendly advice on where I should even begin would really help if anyone has any?

    Thanks in advance,

    Steph x



    #13955 Report


    Sorry to hear of your circumstances.

    First, please be aware there is a lot of support and advice around and you are not totally alone. Also, while it seems like a terrifying prospect to leave home and have the responsibility of looking after a little baby without the security blanket of a regular income (and place to stay!) these are problems that can be resolved!

    As you have no family where you are now I take it that there is nothing (now) holding you to central London except for the job.

    Please tell us some more about your personal circumstances. How long have you been married? The longer the marriage the more the courts are likely to give you in a divorce.

    Have you and your husband discussed finances and has he agreed to make any regular contribution towards the baby? What is your joint financial position ie. do you have any savings together? Any joint debts? Are you in a professional / business / career where it is easy to get a job elsewhere?

    #13958 Report


    Thank you for your reply.

    Bit of a background…We both run a pub and the property is paid for by the company as a perk of accepting the positions. We’ve been with the company for 2 years almost. We moved to London following a huge fallout with his family. I have estranged parents and a brother that lives in Kuwait.

    We’ve been married for 8 years, we both had debt from before we got together and have worked hard to pay it all off and are now both debt free.  The only savings we have between us are in a joint account for my baby.

    He has agreed to support me financially towards my son but we haven’t yet agreed any amounts etc.

    He claims he wants access to him, which is great for my baby but he refuses to care for him so that I’m able to work.

    Thank you sososo much again for your reply x

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