When a District judge states that more than one solicitor is "Wrong"
19 December 2019 at 11:35 am #34206
I had relationship for 11 years, engaged but never married, she had a just over 2 year old daughter, when we met, the father had passed with cancer when she was just 1 year old, so in that 11 years a bond had built with child, arguably stronger than had the father been alive… But almost immediately from seperation I had access to the biological 4 year old daughter, I was denied access a few times but mostly contact, even a year of 50/50, the stepdaughter was a complete other issue, from June 2018 I have seen her with any degree of considered quality time for just 10 days – this a child that did refer to myself as “dad”.. So no reason from the mother why she has made such clear exclusion.
My Ex makes a C100 application to the court, minus mention of the stepdaughter, first hearing I am clear, we have a forgotten child, Section 7 report ordered, and conducted minus this child..??? – a family report, minus a family member.. so its a process thats just ignored a child – and to make it worse there is factual evidence and school reports to this forgotten child, suddenly having wild school behaviour, attempts to run away from home, and even trying to jump from the mothers car while moving….
The point of post:
I used the option taking 30min FREE solicitor consultations, I did 6 different solicitors, with my various questions, but most consistent was What can be done about the forgotten child…? – all 6 responded that I was a person of significance in that child’s life, and that the relationship if so desired by the now 14 year old child should continue, also suggested was to apply for parental responsibility.. I held fire on this, until next hearing, where I was instructed by the District Judge to make application, regardless of my Ex’s protests in court. Next court hearing was adjourned as CAFCASS were not present, but the District Judge on the day, did not right off the application.
so at this point I have 6 solicitors, and a District Judge all say “Yes” all very positive, a District Judge that says “Maybe”, but that may have because he was not making judgement on that day..
Final hearing for biological daughter, stepdaughter application was pushed in, and done in 4 minutes!! – “You have no jurisdiction, we will not proceed further with application” – I questioned how I had the view of the solicitors and a District Judge – he’s words were “they are all wrong!!!, solicitors can get things wrong….
Now I am confused, how can so many solicitors and a District Judge all have the same wrong view…?20 December 2019 at 7:58 pm #34250
I have 3 kids with a man who left his first partner and daughter moved to a different county and pursued a relationship.
He never mentioned his daughter. He was distant from his family evem after I’d given birth he never invited his family over to our home and never mentioned his previous relationship.
I’m now seeing a man with two children. His never denied them and encouraged conversations surrounding them.
I was 20 years old with my kids dad. He was 23. All he had to do was be honest. He chose to put a silencer on his past. I am not the type of person to force conversation or disclosure as I believe in growth and development. I can acknowledge that people change and that family life is individual for members within that family.
You can’t force what you don’t know.
I could have pestered him more. But he should have been more open and honest.
His family never got involved with our children not until I’d been placed in a womens refuge after he’d been in prison.
The first time I saw his mum was in court.
He moved from a different county to where I was living at home with my mum, step dad and siblings whilst at college.
That was his choice.
There was no gun to his head.
He chose to stay dispite police reports and a volatile household. Not only did he chose to stay he also complained about me to social workers stating I was uncapable of caring for myself, I was lazy and never there.
I worked as a waitress amongst other jobs. I returned to faith and went to 0-1s groups. He had every opportunity to remove everything from our home and leave.
I’ve been in court every year for better contact arrangements with the 3 children I gave birth to.20 December 2019 at 8:19 pm #34251
My eldest is now 14.
I plan on going back to court next year to argue her competence to make decisions for herself.
This is after speaking with independent social workers from the BASW.20 December 2019 at 11:27 pm #34262
Can you not appeal? May be the Judge at the final hearing is wrong instead?