What to do
27 November 2019 at 11:41 am #33365
Hi I’m new to this I need some advice on my situation. I have a disability and suffer from anxiety and depression. My Ex and I split 2 years ago, but we were still cohabiting until this year when she moved back to her mums. We have a teenage son that we share custody every other week. My dilemma is that she doesn’t want to live in the council flat we shared we are both on the tenancy agreement. I have been on to shelter and have been informed while she remains on the tenancy !. I </span>have been on to shelter and have been informed while she remains on the tenancy I’m safe living here but when she removes herself from the tenancy the council will not let me remain here as she is claiming child benefit so In their eyes she’s the main care giver for our son. I have been told by the council that when she removes herself from the tenancy they would look to move me to a one bedroom flat bed sit. We informed the council that she has moved out and that she’s remaining on the tenancy and because she’s claiming for our son I now have to pay room tax for my son even though we share custody. I have asked her to sign child benefit to me, so I can remove her from the tenancy that way my son and I still have somewhere to live. I told her that in future I would have no problem signing the benefit back to her that I just want stability for my son and I. My son is the only thing keeping me going since we broke up, and the thought of living in a one- bed flat with him having no privacy and not wanting to stay because of this is playing havoc with my anxiety. The not knowing what is going to happen and having this hanging over my head is not helping. We are still on good terms but this situation is putting a strain on us being friendly as I’m trying to look to the future but I can’t until this is sorted. I have been told that there is the legal route where I can go for custody of our son but I don’t want to go down that route. Thanks.27 November 2019 at 6:48 pm #33404
have you spoken to anyone from Citizen’s Advice Bureau? They may be of some help. Good that you can see some positives- keeping amicable etc. Hang in there.28 November 2019 at 10:43 am #33424
Thanks for the replies, I have appointment with citizens advice next week to discuss it. I’m on ESA and she’s in full time employment at the moment we split the benefit every month but that just covers the extra room rate I have to pay. I spoke to a friend and he said that I should claim the child benefit and that I would probably get it because she’s in full time employment and has the opportunity to increase her income where as I’m on benefits I don’t. I don’t know if that is true.I have asked her about signing it over to me and she says that if people ask who the main career is it would be the person claiming the child benefit and she doesn’t want that to be me. I told her that was silly as we share custody but I think she’s just being selfish. I can understand her somewhat as my disability has stop me from working I have been a stay at home parent while she went to work/university and she feels our son loves me more because of this, I’ve told her he loves us both but she still has that doubt and that’s why she won’t sign it over. but I don’t want things to get nasty between us because of this but I just want to move on with things.