Vulnerable single mother just fresh from abroad
14 March 2018 at 3:57 am #8644
I’m looking for advice on my current situation, or should I say complete mess or crisis.
I am originally from London, but 3 years ago I married my husband in Macedonia (former Yugoslavia) and gave birth to a daughter in 2015. However, my husband became extremely violent towards me and my daughter when she was a baby. He was reported to the Macedonian police on many occasions, and by different people, as well as myself. However, in Macedonia domestic violence is rarely prosecuted to the fullest degree of the law, and when the government did finally decide to charge him, I was told by the prosecution that he was most likely to walk and receive probation, even though he was being charged with serious aggravated assault. After two years of violence and psychological torment in a foreign country, I decided to bring my daughter back home to London. It took my 6 months to prepare to leave, to get my daughter a right to abode, as she was not born in the UK, permission from my husband to take my daughter abroad (which was given to me for 3 months only) and finally, it took 4 months to convince him to give his consent for a British passport for our daughter. After all that, we arrived at Luton Airport. I am living with my sick father in a one bedroom basement flat, and it is extremely overcrowded. So far I have been turned away from my local council for housing, rejected from Universal Credit (although I have appealed) and have found myself disillusioned with the place I grew up.
Is there anyone with any information or advice who or where I could turn to for support?14 March 2018 at 7:05 am #8645
Have you gone to Citizens Advice?15 March 2018 at 3:04 pm #8752
Khaleesi Mother Of DragonsParticipant
Hey there, well done for getting free. It isn’t easy.
Have to tried Women’s Aid to see if they have any refuge places available? As your ex is abroad I’m not sure if they can do this for you but it is worth asking.
There’s also Rights for Women which give legal advice and they might be able to help too.
K15 March 2018 at 6:08 pm #8793
Firstly im sorry that you faced the abuse you did. It’s not just to be abused amd nor for your child to be around it. You made the right move coming back to UK.
Due to you being out of the country you won’t get council housing for probably another 2 years. I say this because i have been in very similar situation and came back pregnant suddenly over night. My local council said i could go on the list when i have been here for 2 years in this area.
Please find your nearest citizen’s advice office and take your child with you to visit them. They are stars working hard to help those in need of advice. They will direct you to places that can help you and what benefits you may be entitled to.
If your daughter is 3 she may well qualify for “3 and 4 year old funding” so she can go to nursery. You can apply for it online just do a google search. You will be given a code and take that to the nursery of your choice.
If you are in need of food then google “food bank” plus the area where you live and they will help.
Society has changed alot and you probably have seen that already. There are some very loving people. Local churches sometimes have kids sessions or mum’s meet ups. Am not Christian but i love my local church, they have been amazing to me and my child.
If there is anything else you need info about then please don’t hesitate to ask.
Umm.23 May 2018 at 7:39 am #11582
Hiya. I hope you and your little one are alright. I’m just wondering if you found out any more info please as I’m in the same situation as you. I’m coming back to the UK on 14th of June and don’t know what to do. My boy is only 1 year old. x