Unplanned pregnancy, single with 3rd child and scared.

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  • #15690 Report


    >’m already a mum of two, who were born into a loving relationship prior to our divorce. I started to see someone who I THOUGHT was lovely.

    Im around 6 weeks pregnant with his child. He’s consistently tried to force me into a termination this past week, telling me he doesn’t know what he could provide and just general non want of the baby. I turned round in the end and told him under no circumstance am I allowing him to bully me into a choice, he then said he has nothing to say to me, he made his feelings and thoughts clear on the issue and blocked me on everything. It’s made me feel awful, I was raped 2 months ago by a friend and he was there, he knows what I’ve been through and this on top really isn’t helping (the baby isn’t from the rape, I had a period 2 weeks after and a pregnancy test after my bleed) I’ll be honest that I missed a few pills, but it was the last thing on my mind and really so was sex, but we did it and now there’s a life im me.

    I don’t know the best way to handle it, I had a wee meltdown last night and scheduled a termination for Saturday morning, he’s still blocked me on everything, so I can’t communicate with him. I understand if I got nasty and was immature about the whole thing, but I’ve been very balanced and did the typical woman going through an unplanned pregnancy abort/keep/abort/keep etc. We’re not young children either, I’d expect this from a younger man.


    I’m facing either ending a child’s life or keeping it and being alone with a newborn and two daughters by a different father, which is just another can of worms.</span>

    My heart is saying keep, but jm scared how ill financially cope, how ill mentally cope. Im just trying to seek advice off people who have been in my position


    #15747 Report


    Being a man I am probably not the best to give advice, but I would urge you to contact the samaritans or go to your doctor.

    Take time and do not be pressured to make a rash decision.

    I think you are amazing to care enough to want the best for the child.

    The money concerns could be sorted with help ie stepchange and I have suffered with depression so know how bleak things can look initially, but you can get help and things may appear very different.

    Whatever decision you make I am sure it will be the right one and one no one has the right to judge you for…. I would just try your best to get into the best frame of mind  which should make the right decision for you… because this is what its about…not me..not someone else… but you and your life, but try and get the right support network behind you.

    When my wife left me I was sure I was never going to see my kids again and nearly made a rash decision when everything seemed lost. Two years on I share parenting  and they are my everything. From being selfish and a workaholic my priority is totally the kids so I know it is easy for ne to say now but things will get better for you.

    I wish you all the best and hope things sort themselves out x


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