Today is my wedding anniversary 😞

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  • #61757 Report

    Mumoffive
    Participant

    We’ve been on and off for 2.5 years. Currently off though still telling one another we love each other. 6 years married today. Had a dream wedding in Cyprus. Not heard from him yet. Not sure why I even long to hear from him. The last 2 anniversaries we haven’t spent together. Just feel really sad by the fact I keep wanting him back all the time even though there’s been so much hurt

    #61760 Report

    RightthenEm
    Participant

    Sending love x

    #61762 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    Thinking about you. Anniversaries are always tough. If you can and want, treat yourself to something tonight.

    #61764 Report

    Mumoffive
    Participant

    Thank you for responding. I’m getting more upset as the evening is going on and not hearing from him. We were messaging a lot last night. The last 2 texts last night were sent by myself. I know I could message him today also, but I think seeing as though I sent the last messages last night maybe he could’ve done the decent thing and at least responded to them messages though he obv hasn’t

    #61765 Report

    Mumoffive
    Participant

    I think I do need a treat if some sort because me cat also failed it’s MOT today 😞

    #61766 Report

    Mumoffive
    Participant

    Oh my goodness, I haven’t been drinking honest lol. That did make me giggle when I looked back at my post! My car even, not me cat lol

    #61767 Report

    JuneB
    Participant

    I giggled at that too and it made me want to reply… I’m always doing that with text massages 😉so sorry you are feeling rotten. you really need to spoil yourself. it’s so hard when you still love him but there are obviously reasons why you can’t be together……. when I feel lonely and rotten I either speak or zoom a friend, take a long bath ( sometimes after some ridiculous 20 min workout on line) go for a walk, or binge watch something. it seems to get me through. what would get you through this eve??? x

    #61768 Report

    Privatelady
    Participant

    I can relate to this. Tomorrow is my wedding aniversary. Well the official date on the papers. The ceremony was the 24th as we married in Greece. Dream wedding. Together for 7 years, however married for 2 but he decided that our relationship had been a lie and walked out in me and our 5 year old and he lied when he married me and never wanted to.

    I’ve spent what should have been packing for our anniversary holiday as we never got a honeymoon due to the pandemic speaking with solicitors trying to find out ways of setting in stone when he should be stepping up and seeing our child as he seems happier taking himself on holiday and not coming for her unless it fits into his world 😕

    Just think though the day is nearly over l. Tomorrow’s a new one.

     

    #61783 Report

    Mumoffive
    Participant

    So I done something I told myself I wasn’t going to do….I ended up calling him asking if I can pop to his and that’s what I done. Nothing happened just watched tv, drank t, even had a bit of a laugh. It’s so sad we can’t be together. We’ve been back and forth for 2.5 years (he’s left around 5 times due to his drug habit) we’ve not lived together for just over a year now but I still miss him terribly. He claims to want his family back but does nothing to change! I’ll never understand!

    He only wants to see our children when me and him are getting on ok. He said he’ll see them this weekend and that’ll be the first time in 7 weeks!

    #61835 Report

    Privatelady
    Participant

    Anniversarys are always going to be hard but take a long hard think which I’m sure you already have…

    If he is using drugs, no matter how much love is there, and they hold him into addiction he will loose his mental capacity and ability to think properly, even if he appears to have it to hold down meaningful relationships, and could slip up, even accidently, in a way which could lead to safeguarding issues and cause harm to either you, himself or even the children even in the most unintentional way. A simple example for this could be spending money on his poison of choice instead of a need for the home or children, a more severe one could be for example cannabis an accidental fire. I lived this when I was 19, my brother left us homeless through what’s seen as a safe drug. He set the house on fire with a spliff because h was tha stoned he didn’t dock it. The gas exploded. We all got out but we loved on blow up beds in my unless fkr months homeless

    He’s also stolen from all of us over the years from pounds to hundreds of pounds for his safety to pay off debt this should be legal drug according to society, and we are his family, and that’s supposed to be the softest drug, my mums has dealers knock at all hours when we where young looking for him, we didn’t need to see that, (I speak to him but not much, how do you speak to somebody who stole from you and nearly killed you?)

    I love my brother but its became really dangerous to be around when I was younger with the drugs and I’m sure it gre into more than just cannabis, I’ll never know but have suspicions.

    I will do anything for him and if heaven forbid he got sick I would be the first one there but I can’t stand by with the drugs. I’m in my kid 30s now. These experiences are from growing up with him on drugs from being a young teen to early 20s as an overview.

    My experience was as a teen growing up seeing drug use from a sibling not a parent figure seeing drug use. I’m sharing it with you because there is always an impact of it on young people as well as other family members in the household.

     

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