advice please. Currently my ex husband has our 2 children over night Wednesdays and over night Friday 6pm to Saturday 5pm. I have them all other times. Whilst this was mutually agreed when we first split up to ease the children into the massive change, I know feel that it no longer is suitable. I have suggested that we change to every other weekend Friday to Sunday but still keeping the Wednesday night . He has point blankly refused even though he has agreed to in the past. The children are 12 and 9. The amount of nights spent with him will be exactly the same. We are not divorced and so far have not involved 3rd parties in any aspect of our separation.
Queen of the World, how could I argue with you? (Sarcastic comment)
As a super hero myself, I wouldn’t really know how to answer your query apart from – negotiate. And see what happens. Not sure what you are expecting. As ‘Queen of the World’ my guess is you are expecting everything to go your way ?
do you know why your ex isn’t keen to swap? At the moment, he has every Saturday night and Sunday for socialising. Or does he have work or an activity that takes up his Saturday evening or his Sunday. Do the children have classes or activities on Sunday that he may not want to support? Not keen on going to Sunday morning football practice in the cold? Does he generally have a hangover on a Sunday morning? Is he a heavy drinker? Does he have a new partner who has children who alternate?
The existing arrangement also prevents you from going away from the weekend. Could it be that he wants to prevent you from forming a new relationship? It also prevents him from having weekends away so maybe not.
if you know what the issue is, perhaps you’d find a compromise.
What do the children want? At 12, your eldest is old enough to express a preference.
In the end, you could go through the courts to get an access order, but there is no guarantee he would stick to it.