The Law, The Logic, a Moral Compass and a CAFCASS Section 7 Report… part two
14 August 2019 at 3:09 pm #29197
I was in a relationship for just over 10 years, to a woman who at the time had been left a widow, as her husband had passed away through cancer, leaving behind her and a daughter not even 3 years old, until June last year, I had been partner and an extremely respectful father/step father to the daughter, after all her dad did not chose to exit her life, we also ourselves have a 3 year old daughter.
So after all the years of relationship, moved house 3 times, lived as a family unit in all those years, I suddenly get a text a 2pm while I am in work, telling me locks have been changed, I have 30min to say what I need from house or “I get Nothing” as she is going away for the weekend with the girls… Sure enough when I get back from work, there gone, and I have just £2.46 in my pocket, the clothes on my back, and keys to a courtesy car. – this was seen as an acceptable way to treat a human being..
- in the relationship we lost a daughter at 24 weeks of pregnancy – daughter 1 lost
- I have had the stepdaughter of just over 10 years removed from my life for no other reason than the mums view of “your not on her birth certificate so none of your business” – daughter 2 lost
- My genetic daughter who’s just 3 years old, is the last daughter I’m able to fight for, so in 14 months
<li style=”text-align: left;”>I have been blackmailed twice, if I did not do something, I would not see my genetic daughter
- stepdaughter has in a report on numerous occasions tried to run away, even tried to jump from mum’s moving car.
- police were called after the mum reportedly kicked the side of her car, and repeatedly punched herself in the head in front of the girls, and argument police later said was over “School shoes…”
<li style=”text-align: left;”>twice denied access to my daughter, the first because the mum decided on handover day that we should not have a holiday that was already agreed, and the second, because the mum fancied a few extra days with our daughter.
<li style=”text-align: left;”>repeated allegations, of domestic violence, attempting to blow her up with a small butane gas bottle, stalking, harassment the latest in the list.
<li style=”text-align: left;”>denied access to my belongings, some of which she has recently been selling online..
<li style=”text-align: left;”>my daughters medical records denied me so I couldn’t register her for preschool, yet the mum registered our child, no consultation, my details left blank on her file as if she had no dad.
<li style=”text-align: left;”>Just had a CAFCASS home visit as part of a section 7 report, and was told “what we put in our report is pretty much what the court goes with”.. so a month before court hearing, I now have a report that has me equal on merit as a parent, based a 1 hour assessment, but the recommendation, that I loose custody because of the step daughter, so the daughter I have had taken from me, is the decider for my apparent 3rd loss..
this feels extremely cruel on balance… how can we teach the future generations right from wrong if it seems we don’t lead by example…?14 August 2019 at 5:21 pm #29199
Thanks for posting here – it sounds like you’re having a very difficult time and I’m sure the other members of the forum will be able to offer you support.
You don’t mention if you have a solicitor or are getting any legal help with the court case. If not, Child Law Advice have a helpline offering free legal advice: https://childlawadvice.org.uk/. You can also find other sources of free legal help on our website: https://www.gingerbread.org.uk/information/legal-help-and-responsibilities/getting-legal-help/
You can also contact Families Need Fathers, a charity which offers help and support to those who are separated or divorced and worried about not seeing their children: https://fnf.org.uk/help-and-support-2/about-help-support