I have a 13 year old Daughter with such low self esteem, she’s been in tears all evening. She struggles with friendships, and with all what’s going on right now this is proving a real issue. Where all her ‘friends’ are communicating via group chats, she’s either left out or doesn’t know how to get involved.
She says she hates herself, that she doesn’t look like all the skinny girls who are posting pics of themselves all over social media etc. , That’s she’s different to all the others.
I’ve done all the mum things reassuring her how beautiful she is etc and encouraging her to engage in chats with friends, but I’m not sure this has helped.
She has had counselling through school.
Please tell me this is normal, and any advice welcome
Take you and your daughter out for a walk at least, starting from tomorrow.
Get her and you away from social media, and just be together.
From what you’ve said, it sounds as if your daughter is measuring her worth by comparing how she looks, instead of knowing who she is.
You can’t change that in an instant, but you can start.
There’s no better person on this planet to do that but you. So tell her your life history, if you haven’t already.
Tell her everything about you, her father, how you got together, how she came about, from the twinkle in Dad’s eye.
Perhaps you’ve already done this, in which case ignore me.
But on the off-chance you haven’t..tell her everything.
Tell her how you met her Dad, how you got together – any stories, bad or good, if you haven’t already.
Tell her anything that’s true, anything you’ve never told her before.|
Your daughter is rooting around for her identity. It’s up to you to help her find it.