I’m not looking for custody or advice regarding my ex partner but that of my two teens (13yo and 15yo). I’m not OTT but seriously, my daughters (13yo) bedroom is horrendous, literally you can’t see the floor for rubbish and clothes, even her lamp and lap top. I ask the kids to tidy their rooms weekly, bring their washing down etc. I afford them privacy and often don’t venture into their rooms. It drives me crazy, I suppose the lack of respect for the things I’ve provided her. Last week I found a sewing needle and pins stuck in the carpet. The carpet is getting stained by make up.
She has struggled with some anxiety and stress in the past and I feel that ‘less mess equals less stress’, that and structure.
What are other parents views on this? Is it worth the battle it creates?
My room was equally messy as a teen, and I seem to remember Sewing stuff being part of that. The no mess, no stress idea definitely didn’t work for me.
I had a bedsit at 18 and it was more like a “lair”. Wonderfully secure, chilled out and all my own. No stained carpets though.
I’d forewarn your daughters you will be hoovering their rooms on a Monday. Throw everything off the floor onto the bed, remove any dirty plates etc and leave them to sort their own clothes except school uniform.
My son 11, has a laundry bag on the back of his door. If all his dirty laundry is in it on a Saturday morning – is not on the floor, he gets pocket money. If I have to pick things up, no pocket money. He mostly manages this.