Hey,
I’m new here. Over lockdown I finally decided to divorce my ex husband, he was physically and mentally abusive all 4 and a half years of our marriage.
I can handle taking care of my boys alone, but I’m really struggling with this life mentally. I love them so much, I feel so bad to even think badly about my life as it is. I had never planned to have children before that marriage, but he convinced me we should, and we were young-ish.
I’m 26 now and I don’t know how to be self-reliant for happiness. I feel like no one around my age would be willing to date someone who already has kids.
I feel like I need to make connections with other people in order to feel validated. Now I’m getting depressed because of it, I’m trying really hard to stay a good parent, but I barely sleep at night, I cry all the time, I’m easily irritated, I’m not eating much.
I have some really nice friends in this area, but no one I know is in this situation, I’m feeling so confused and isolated.
I love my kids, why do I feel myself disconnecting from them?