Struggling atm

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This topic contains 5 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  Gingey28 4 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #24485 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Hey everyone

    Im finding it tough atm. My little boy is 1 and half and im feeling rly stressed out. He is naturally very attached to me, its lovely the bond but i find i cant move an inch without him screaming. I know hea young and how does he know where im going and that I’ll be back but he is worse when im around others

    Today i wanted to just treat myself to some clothes, my mum came with us i tried a couple of things on and my son screamed when he was waiting outside changing room with my mum. I have just gone to go my gran and grandads as usual eveey weekend but as soon as we got there he screamed, he does this often there and i find it highly stressful, so i just brought him back tonight didnt have the energy at all

    Feel like im doing something wrong? Feel very overwhelmed with it all at times. I love my son so much and as i say its lovely our bond but im feeling drained and dont want to take it out on anyone but my stress levels are increasing

    #24490 Report

    SOLOMUMMY
    Participant

    Attachment issues are normal part of development. My love didn’t go through any until 18-20 months ISH so I feel for you. Until then lo would have been happy with any family members. Then a switch and this was less so.

    Sadly you have to ride it out. Reassure saying I’m going to xyz and keep talking helped…. SonetiSom though I was dat on toilet with baby being cuddled as it was so bad other times I could just keep talking etc.

     

    Do you work? Does baby go ok to anyone ATM? Do you attend baby groups?

    It maybe worth also accepting that things like changing rooms are notoriously difficult for children generally as it’s boring, so possibly in the interim online shopping maybe the way to go. Avoiding unnecessarily difficult situations. I had to avoid greetings card shops and only now at school age would I dare enter and it’s still hit and miss!

    Do you live alone? Could mum.perhaps take lo for a few hours accepting that initially he maybe upset to try and break the cycle and for you to.see baby will be ok……

    #24493 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Hi i have brill help. I work 16 hours a week over 4 days. My mum has him. She comes to mine monday and tues mornings while at work and she has my son overnight wednesday till friday. I am at my gran and grandads with him 3 days a week for tea and 2 of them days we there all afternoon.

    My son cried cos i went to try my clothes on but my mum waited with him.

    I just find it tough when your drained and my grandad doesn’t like it when my son cries or whines so i feel pressure upon myself and i usually take myself home in a huff.

    #24502 Report

    Teaandcake
    Participant

    Hi, sorry you’re struggling at the moment, but the good news is, it is just a phase! My daughter went through it at about the same age, and her dad and I were still together then. I was a SAHM, so she possibly got through this phase quicker. She started pre-school when she was 3, and that was a difficult transition as she was so attached to me (and still is at 6). Whatever happens, be kind to yourself and just lovebomb your son as much as possible and ride it out.

    #24505 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    Hi gingey, My son did that. From about 12 months through to 18 months, he would scream if I was out of sight. It was as if he’d just realised that one day I might not be there.

    We were literally attached at the hip for months, but then it stopped as suddenly as it had started. All I could do was cuddle him and wait for it to pass.

    hopefully it will be short lived

    #24514 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Hi all

    Thank you for your replies. Yes you are all right and I realise im not on my own with this. Think its just cos ive had a rly bad back for a while and only last week docs referred me for xray. Getting me down a little and my leg still sore from when i had vein problem during pregnancy. All gets on top of me.

    I think a trip to the local farm or playcentre on wednesday is on the cards. My mum will come along, she’s great and always there for us

    Hope you all enjoyed ur weekends.

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