Stop dwelling and move on

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  • #58160 Report

    Gazza26
    Participant

    Separated from my wife and about to move into my new home. It was her decision to separate but I can’t seem to emotionally accept the decision.
    How do people deal with the constant reminders of their ex such as songs in the radio, driving past a memorable place or just thinking the last time I was here, I was still in a relationship and didn’t feel so bad.
    my friends tell me to accept the decision that she no longer loves me, and just move on. But I am struggling because every day I am constantly reminded of our 20 relationship that I no longer have

    #58166 Report

    si7160
    Participant

    it’s not a matter of just forgetting and moving on ,

    you will experience stages of grief due to the loss of your relationship with your wife

    there are lots of websites and advice if you search relationship breakdown ,

    https://www.lscft.nhs.uk/help/crisis/1

    please take your time , everyone is different , there are no right or wrong ways to deal with this

    talk over with friends and or family

    don’t bottle it up

    see what services are available in your area , don’t be afraid to ask for help

    my marriage ended abruptly with 4 words without warning no arguments no issues in the marriage

    she moved later a 175 miles away to stay near a work friend

     

    me and the  children managed but it was tough

    please pm if you need to chat

     

     

     

     

     

    #58168 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

     It’s not easy. I avoid the park at busy times so I don’t see the happy families! I turn the radio over to something else. But little steps are important and it does get easier. I like to be out and about. I feel the walls close in if i stay indoors. Retail therapy is good – supermarket for food.

    #58172 Report

    Vintagedresser
    Participant

    I’m going to say 1 thing, life is way to short to cry over someone who does not want to be in your life. Take a day to really process your feelings and then write down all the things you can do now you have this freedom. Getting over an ex is hard but a person that leaves you only deserves so many tears hun. Start living, you will be just fine 🙂

    #58184 Report

    Gazza26
    Participant

    Thank you for the messages. I move out in 2 weeks and still living in the family home. Its a long end to a separation, and i know im not going to feel good when i have to move out

     

    #58187 Report

    JBLA
    Participant

    Hi Gazza,

    Some great advice on here so far, break-ups are tough & its great you are thinking about how to manage it.

    personally have seen the charity Relate be able to give great support too; Coping with thoughts and feelings | Relate

    No Shame in counselling if wanted, it can really help us focus on healing & finding our healthiest steps to a new version of life 🙂

    Best of luck

     

    #58237 Report

    Gazza26
    Participant

    Thank you, I never thought of it like that before

    #58241 Report

    Vintagedresser
    Participant

    Not a problem, enjoy decorating your new place and remember…..everything stops for a cuppa 🙂

Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)

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