Hi there, I am new to the forum, I don’t generally use them but I have been searching for an answer every where without success. I separated last year , I suffer with depression but I always pushed myself to go to work and kept going. When I started my job I was still living with my ex and we had a lovely au pair living with us so I never had trouble with childcare. She finished her one year adventure abroad in February. I now work Wednesday Friday and Saturday. The only childcare that I can claim back with a registered child minder is on Wednesday. Friday and Saturday I have to pay a lot and totally out of my pocket. Plus food and expenses if this nanny takes them out. Plus staying at work stressed, with the mobile in your pocket always available for anything. I have a diagnose of BPD and suffer with anxiety which makes me feel really unsettled and I am deep breathing all day worst than labour. I have been signed off from the gp for work related stress. The idea of going back Wednesday is killing me. As I said I always worked, but after what I have been through this year I feel really vulnerable, emotional and I wish I could resign from this Job. I am happy to find another one in school hours. Cause I receive universal credit, I am worried that if I resign I’ll be sanctioned. I just can’t cope anymore with spending 350 pounds in childcare when I just work in a supermarket and it’s well above my earnings. The more I stress about it the worst I feel. I am a European so no family close by. It’s just us 3. Their dad works abroad.
What to do ?
Sorry for the very long rant but I really don’t know what to do .
Thanks in advance for any reply.
Kind regards
S.