Sock of ex messing me around!

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  • #45158 Report

    Bluebell1121
    Participant

    Just after some guidance. I’m constantly having issues with my ex changing to goal posts of childcare. He walked out on me when I was 24 weeks pregnant. We have a now 3.5 year old and 5 month baby. DS1 stays 2 week nights and one weekend day. DS2 is seen in short bursts due to him being BF and ex only requesting to spend time with him when he was 3.5 months old.

    Ex has been really inconsistent. When he left he said he wanted 2 nights. I agreed to this and agreed to days that worked around his job. He’s now quit said job, for another. The new job was a big promotion with a big pay rise…. he since quit without even working his notice or another job lined up! He has managed to get another job in a school which means that he sees DS1 less during the week as he works week days now. Anyway… he’s now saying he wants DS1 on a weekend night now which, if I agreed, would mean that DS1 would spend no more then 2 nights in a row at one household and it wouldn’t even give ex that much more time as he couldn’t do the following morning drop off as he would be working! I see absolutely no benifit whatsoever to our son, only a complete disruption to everyone.

    ex just keeps constantly changing the goal posts and is acting so selfishly! I am simply not agreeing to the 3rd night. I’ve worked around him the whole of my maternity leave. He hasn’t paid the correct CM and in my eyes he’s just completely unstable.

    My question is, does anyone have an opinion as to how court may asses this? He’s threatened court so many times to me… he’s been very emotionally abusive to me since January. I’ve not slept all night as I know the threats will start again.

    Just want to add I’ve been really flexible to the days he has DS and suggested alternate weekends and also a weekend sleep which follows/leads to a week day sleep. I just don’t know what to do.

    #45164 Report

    warwickshire1
    Participant

    Hi, Should be straight forward. What you need is for your ex partner to have both children at set times and days consistently. If he is on a rota which changes every few weeks then contact would be done in line with that.  Family courts would be very helpful as you arent preventing contact you are just wanting a court order saying when your ex has the kids and him to follow this instead of just coming and going when he pleases.

    #45165 Report

    Bluebell1121
    Participant

    Thanks for the reply!

    see I suppose you could say I am preventing contact as ok not willing to agree to a third night!

    #45166 Report

    warwickshire1
    Participant

    No i dont see you preventing contact. Your ex would probably end up being worse off if he went to family court. Its best he agrees set days and sticks to it without going family court and realises he cant just pick and choose when he does have his kids . Mediation would be a good idea at moment as maybe it could be resolved there

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)

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