Single parent looking for advice.

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  • #30811 Report


    In need of some help and advice, I have recently split up from my boyfriend and he has left the family home that we have a mortgage on. We have had the house a year now and he has decided to split up with me and move out. I’m living with my two sons my eldest isn’t his but my one year old is. He has said he is going to stop paying the mortgage that doesn’t care if we end up homeless. I honestly don’t want to lose my house and just need the right help and advise to get me through this awful time. I honestly hope someone can help me out i don’t have friends to speak to or help me. Thank you.

    #30815 Report


    If the mortgage is not paid, his credit rating will be affected. Is he aware of this? A bad credit rating will affect his ability to get a mortgage elsewhere and have other repercussions. It doesn’t matter if he’s not living in the house, he’s still legally liable for the mortgage payments.

    The position is that you are “jointly and severally” responsible for the mortgage. That means the bank can hold you responsible for the whole amount and they can also hold him responsible for the whole amount. When push comes to shove they tend to go after the one who has the money (or other assets). First, immediately notify them of the change in situation and request whatever concession they are willing to provide – a payment holiday, a temporary interest-only arrangement, whatever.

    The fact that you are not married does put you at a disadvantage. There are various changes you need to make to your finances at this time. You can notify the council that there’s only one adult in the house and that’ll get you a concession on council tax. You can ensure child benefits and and child tax credit elements come to you. You can claim maintenance on him for the child that is his.

    You need to speak with a lawyer or at least one of the free services available online.

    #30828 Report

    Hi there

    I’m sorry you are going through this difficult time.  The uncertainty can be very unsettling.  Its important to find out what your legal rights are.  Our helpline advisers will be able to help you explore your options.  It may be that they won’t have the the exact answers, but they will be able to signpost you to the right agencies that can provide you with accurate information.

    I hope this helps.  Keep talking to the parents here also in the forum.  They are a useful bunch and some of them may have been through a similar situation.

    Good luck, Justine


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