Single Dad – Separation/PR Query (complex)

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This topic contains 4 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  SOLOMUMMY 1 month ago.

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  • #31744 Report

    jonathsm87
    Participant

    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571344747629″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>I am the father of 2 children, they live with me 100% of the time following separation from their biological Mother 6.5 years ago approx. They do not see her and have not done so for approx 3 years. I am the named Father on birth certificates and thus have PR.</div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571344824684″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”></div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571344835367″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>Since approx 6 years ago I have been in a relationship with a new partner, with whom I and the children have lived since December 2015, they refer to her as Mummy and she has active involvement with them (especially my 6.5 year old) as if she was their Mother, she is in effect an unmarried Step Mother.</div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571344928859″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”></div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571344928994″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>We are now separating and are in agreement that my 6.5 year old should spend weekends with her as they have an excellent bond which I do not want to be affected by our separation. Clearly whilst in her care, she would need to be able to make decisions in an emergency situation etc.</div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345025158″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”></div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345025298″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>I have read lots of information online but this seems to be quite a unique situation. I think we need to look at a Child Arrangement Order, however there is no dispute so if we can avoid going to court, clearly that would be preferable for all parties.</div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345079953″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”></div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345080097″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>Is there a way for her, as well as myself to apply for PR if I am in agreement with this? I think that may involve getting agreement from the boys biological Mother, which I am willing to attempt, however we are not in any contact as I mentioned previously so I am unsure what happens if she doesn’t respond (I only have a mobile phone number for her, no address/email).</div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345149812″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”></div>
    <div id=”yMail_cursorElementTracker_1571345149961″ style=”overflow-wrap: break-word; color: #000000; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: medium;”>Wondering if anyone else has been through a similar situation?</div>

    #31745 Report

    jonathsm87
    Participant

    Sorry not sure what has happened with formatting there.

    #31751 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    I’m not sure you need a child arrangement order. When my son is in the care of the school, I sign a document saying I authorise them to seek emergency medical care without consulting me.

    Would the same not work here?  You are placing your child in the care of someone you trust to act in their best interests, and authorising them to act for you in your absence.

    #31784 Report

    Ramblinjon
    Participant

    Try giving these folk a ring:

    Child law advice service 0300 330 5480

    Hope this helps

    Mark

    #31803 Report

    SOLOMUMMY
    Participant

    Hi

    I fully understand your current intentions. BUT giving her parental responsibility now that you’re split seems counterintuitive.

    It would give her the same rights as you when surely all you wish is for her to act in loco parentis? In the case of an accident etc?

    Though things are amicable now, what if later on you as a parent disagree with her approach? She’d effectively have as much right as you to decide. What if you start a third or fourth relationship that ends, will you give them or too?

    I genuinely think that in your position pr is not the right thing. A letter of consent maybe.

    Given this, I’d advise you to utilise a free half hour advice session with a family solicitor.

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