Sick of it all now!

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  • #58645 Report

    Siany2103
    Participant

    I’m feeling so angry and down!
    first husband lied continuously and showed me no respect, second partner was controlling and abusive, third partner was depressed and didn’t care about me, second husband never wanted me and cheated on me throughout our marriage!
    Second husband plays mind games and first husband has everything! The house, the wife, the kids.
    I don’t know if I can take much more! Why is life so unfair????? If this is karma then I must have really been a cruel person at some point.

    #58648 Report

    Margo
    Participant

    I am sorry you feel like that.  I used to attracted abusive partners too. I won’t go into sharing my experiences… heart breaking stuff.  I spend a lot of time blaming them for how they treated me, being angry and depressed, I also couldn’t understand ‘why?’. Trying different forms of therapy over the years and thousands of hours on self study I realised that I attracted abusive partners and everyday people into my life because of my subconscious beliefs on what I deserved (and distorted, due to childhood trauma, understanding of what love is)  It’s confusing stuff but really interesting and worth exploring.  I found it very helpful and soothing listening to Louise Hey on you tube:“Assisting in Your Own Healing” by Louise Hay (sorry, for some reason, I’m not able to copy the link)
    “It Didn’t Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle” by Mark Wolynn is an interesting read. Best wishes x

    • This reply was modified 2 weeks, 6 days ago by GingerbreadJustine. Reason: moderator removed formatting codes
    #58653 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    Call me? I’m here to help.

    #58654 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    Things aren’t as bad as they seem. We will sort it.

    #58656 Report

    Siany2103
    Participant

    Hi Andrew.

    Thank you for the offer but I won’t be calling. I’m sure you’re a really nice person but there is an element of safety to think about when making friends online. I don’t give out my number. I did once and that person started to call me instead of texting. I just thought we’d text.
    thank you for your support. It’s nice to know someone cares

    #58685 Report

    skiney
    Participant

    Siany if I told you what happened to me you’d feel better but not sure you or anybody wants to hear my problems. Haven’t got enough balls to say what’s happened to me. I’m strong but killing myself not talking

    #58691 Report

    Siany2103
    Participant

    Thank you Margo x

    #58692 Report

    Siany2103
    Participant

    Skiney,

    im sure anyone on this forum would be willing to read why you have gone through if they thought it would help you to write it. It’s the whole point of this website. To support each other. I know that if you need to communicate I would read and respond.

    #58698 Report

    JBLA
    Participant

    Hi Siany,

    So sorry to read you are feeling like this, tbh think it’s perfectly valid to feel all these things healing from any break up, but especially if the ex’s have been a shit too.

    Hugs if wanted xx You have every right to feel angry & sick about being treated like this!

    Margo hits the nail on the head, we’ve got to do the work to heal ourselves & prevent letting people like this in, although I do think there can be wider social conditioning at play that informs or enables these types of behaviours and our vulnerabilities too. As much as our experiences can be some of the thousands of types of karma- no matter how well educated or how much we work on ourselves, sometimes people are just shit, shit happens & bad stuff happens to good people.

    As much as we can reach the pits of exasperation, blame or shame with it… good people do exist & it’s still possible to meet them. 🙂

    Maybe now could be a time to put yourself first, fill your life & give yourself a million healthy happy things they never could. You sound like you deserve it. We don’t need our worth set with people who don’t see the value in trust, honesty or respect. Setting our own, independent of them can be a gateway to happiness & shaking off the crap put onto us. You are worth & deserve better 🙂

    Hope that helps beautiful xx

     

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