Since having my 3rd child with my now ex life has gone down hill fast. I never new someone who you believed love you could destroy your world. It started off little things like him ignoring us and the kids or snapping at us and then he quickly started getting verbally abusive, disappearing for hours and spending money on takeaways whilst he was at work and hiding it. The turning point was him threatening to kill himself if I didn’t agree with him and then one night he threatened to kill himself took a knife and went missing and I had to call the police. I asked him to stay with his parents for a few days for a break he started screaming and his family bullied me into letting him come home. I finally asked him to leave and he’s making our lives miserable. He took everything he has ever bought for the house such as furniture etc. I ve tried making a contact plan where it was supervised until she got use to him and I felt she was safe but he keeps changing the arrangements. He comes over for an hour or 2 every two weeks to see her and it usually ends up in him kicking off over nothing and everything. Our daughter is 17 months old and doesn’t like to be alone with him and cries if he picks her up. I don’t know what to do. He’s so up and down you can never feel completely comfortable around him. he can drive dangerously and has even crashed a car and driven at over 100 miles an hour with me and the baby in the car. I just don’t know how I can keep dealing with him without going insane. I don’t know what to do
It sounds like there is something bad going on in your ex’s life – mental health issues maybe or alcohol or something, but if he’s frightening your daughter and driving dangerously with both of you in the car, you are at risk, and need some professional advice.
The issue with the knife will be on police record which will help because it shows he has problems at the moment. Don’t feel guilty, you need to protect yourself and your little one.
Thanks so much yeah I will try them. I know he’s had time off for depression and he’s on medication but he doesn’t seem to grasp the fact he needs to build on there relationship. He can be an amazing dad if he got help and sorted his life out.
Sounds like you’re going through it.
I’d suggest looking into using a contact centre, this way you will have the support around you and your little one.
I’d also suggest talking it through with gingerbreads helpline and I’ve also found help for children and woman’s aid to be really useful.
take care and I hope you have a happy Christmas xx