recently separated and pregnant

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  • #62905 Report

    pinkflower
    Participant

    Hi everyone, this is my first post

    I am 31 years old and had  along term relationship for 12 years. I was married to this person January 2020, but recently, he decided to leave me. He wants to be involved with coparenting and wants to help me if I need anything right now that I am pregnant. It has been very hard. Never been pregnant before, married before or had a long term relationship with anyone like this before. I was in severe depression when he left me. Right now I am coping better. I am afraid of the expenses that are to come, my living situation ( i live in our house but need to sell soon because I can’t afford it by myself once we finalize the divorce, we are both paying half right now) and i am also afraid that i will never be able to be with anyone else because sadly I still love him.  Has anyone been in a similar situation before? I do have support from his parents and my family ( my family is a bit far away)

     

    #62960 Report

    Newmum84
    Participant

    Sorry to hear your situation. My situation is that I became pregnant last year and my partner has been up and down about the situation from when I became pregnant to since I gave birth (baby is 3 months old now). Partner works away and I class myself as a single parent at the moment. Can barely call him my partner to be honest. He was amazing when baby was born, then he became distant.

    With regards to money and living situation – I rent a house alone (with baby) and was able to apply and receive Universal Credit and child benefit funds via Gov.uk website. I am also going to apply for a maternity grant which can be requested within 6 months of baby being born. I also receive SMP (statutory maternity allowance) from my job. Oh and  I’m yet to talk to my partner about him helping me financially- which he legally has to.

    Are you working? If you apply for the above you will be ok financially I would have thought.

    I’m sure you’re feeling extremely lonely and hurt – I don’t understand how men can become a different person and leave when their partner or wife becomes pregnant, blows my mind.

    #62961 Report

    Newmum84
    Participant

    Statutory Maternity Pay I meant!

    #62962 Report

    pinkflower
    Participant

    Im sadly from the US. I decided to join this group since we dont have anything like this in the US. We only get 3 months of partial pay for maternity leave. At one point i really thought abortion was the best option but I couldn’t do it. 🙁

    #62991 Report

    Newmum84
    Participant

    Oh I see! You will be ok. . . it’s good that your ex is able to support you still if you need anything, I would make the most of his help as much as possible. Is there no other help or support in the U.S – either financially or emotionally?

    #62996 Report

    Anonymous
    Inactive

    You might also try mumsnet and start your own thread.

    I know there are several mums on there from different countries might be worth trying.

     

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)

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