Quitting work after 14 years advice needed

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  • #36299 Report

    Legallyblonde
    Participant

    My husband and I separated over a year ago. I’m therefore a single mother with a 2 year old and I’m working 30 hours per week. I’ve worked there 14 years. My parents are my only source of chilcare and its getting a struggle for them. My mother is 65 and my dad is 82 and in poor health. I’m often having to use annual leave or leave work when my dad is unwell or has medical appts. I have tried creche but they usually end up ringing me saying my daughter is inconsolable and to pick her up and more recently was making herself sick in the car on her way there as she isn’t dealing well with being left on her own. I am faced with maybe needing to give up work to care for her or at least for the time being to build up her confidence to go to creche by getting her involved in more social settings / groups before she starts creche  / school. As it stands , as my father isn’t driving due to a recent stroke, my daughter is indoors Monday- Thursday while I’m in work and I’m concious that other than weekends she doesn’t do much. Another thing is that she is with her dad half of the weekend which means i only really get quality time with her 1.5 days a week. My other concern is when she starts nursery in a year, i will be her only mode of transport which will mean again having to stress about how this will affect my work. Gingerbread inform me until she’s 3 universal credit will be understanding of my situation but after that it will be difficult for me to justify being off work. Anyone else in a similar situation that can provide advice particularly on universal credit and the criteria and requirements at 2 and 3 years old? Thanks!

    #36301 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    I have been in the same position as you but no family to help. Try reducing your hours or find a sympathic registered child minder. My daughter went to nursery at 10 months and I went to work. Nursery call me every week. Fortunately I had sympathic male boss.  Children grow up quickly and you will regret giving up your job. My child is looked after by child minder after school  and they all look so happy and well cared for. Good luck

    #36302 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    I agree with Sherina about finding a good childminder. I took my son to see a few when he was 2. For most of them, he didn’t let go of my hand or say anything, but at the last, he let go, toddled off, sat down and started playing, and didn’t want to leave.

    He went to that childminder until he started reception.
    Maybe try to find one close to work, so you can travel together, and not be far away if he isn’t feeling well.

    #36303 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    My biggest regret is not taking her to child minder in the first place. They will give your child attention and look at their ofstedreport. I found mine on council website.

     Nurseries leave children to cry! My daughter was tearful one mornimg and I askdd the nursery assistant to give my daughter a cuddle. These people employed by the nursery also had their own children there. When I went to leave this woman child went up to my daughter and hit her because she was sitting on her mothers lap. The assistant didn’t tell her daughter off. I immediately took my daughter to another part of the room and waited until more staff arrived to explain that my daughter is a bit tearful.

    #36309 Report

    Legallyblonde
    Participant

    Thanks both! Would I get help to fund the cost of a child minder?

    #36315 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    Yes but look on council website for ofstead registration. They show you their insurance and a good child minder will have a notice board in hall way with their credentials. Don’t bother with nursery as they have high turn over staff and are understaffed.

    #36317 Report

    Legallyblonde
    Participant

    Thank you! Do childminders usually do school runs aswell?

    #36318 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    Yes mine does but my daughter gets picked up by school bus from me and goes after school where school bus drops child off. I pick up after school to go home from minder

    #36319 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    You find a minder you can drop off at 7.30am so you can get to work. They give child breakfast and take to school and pick up til you can collect. Our minder does this for children In the group my child go after school so I can get to work. Nursery is all about money making etc..

    #36320 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    Child minder gives them after noon tea. Our minder gives them a hot home made meal

    #36322 Report

    Legallyblonde
    Participant

    Thanks for all your help!

    #36324 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    No problem, just go on website there is a list of registered ones on council list. It took me around 8 weeks to find a child minder

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 12 total)

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