Prohibited Steps Order

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  • #38684 Report

    DannyB99
    Participant

    Hi

    I am new to the forum and a single dad to a 4 year old. I currently have a prohibited steps order in place for 6 weeks for my son so my wife can only see him under supervision.

    Background info

    Me and my wife split in December, she got into a new relationship with someone at work after 3 days. We had split once before in May and at that time she rented her own apartment. When we got back together and she came back to the marital home she kept the apartment as there was a 12 month lease on it.

    When she left in December I had my son 1 night during the week and every other weekend from Fro-Saturday. She moved her new BF into the apartment after 1 week of knowing him and as my 4 year old would wake up during the night, she would get him in bed with her and to my son a stranger. Very weird and she was told by me and her family this was not healthy for our Son and that it would be better for him until she knew the new BF alot better that he stayed on nights where my son was with me. She ignored this advice.

    Throughout the next 3 months a number of compulsive lies were told, so I was always unsure as to my sons safety as she had been known to be a heavy drinker in the past and suffer from Anxiety and Depression. I was then informed her new BF was a regular user of cocaine, something which she was addicted to 6 years ago and I helped her get off.

    Over the last 3 months her behaviour has been very strange and my son was taken out of nursery for 1 whole week and nursery could not contact her as she was not returning calls.  Her bestfriend then made an anonymous tip to social services saying she was taken cocaine on a regular basis at her apartment with her new partner whilst my son was there, drinking large amounts of alchohol, and my son not going to bed until late because of the state she was in. She was also driving to drug dealers houses with my son in the car. Due to lack of evidence social never followed up, but they only made 1 phone call to her

     

    Based on the above I went to see a solictor who said I need to push for a prohibited steps order to protect my son otherwise if I do nothing based on the information and something happens to my son,ill never forgive myself and if I wanted to push for custody in the future they would ask why I never acted before.

     

    I took the solictors advice and took her to court and the judge ruled in my favour based on the info and requested drug and alchohol testing take place, doctors records received on her mental health and a report from nursery.

     

    I have had my son since the beginning of March until the next court hearing on the 16th.

     

    I have received a huge amount of abuse from her family saying how could I take her son from her based on a report to social with no evidence, but surely based on the above even if its a suspicion anyone else would have acted on this, the judge was independant so obviously felt the same that it was the best thing whilst investigations were carrier out.

     

    Has anyone else been in a similar situation, feel like everyone is against me for trying to protect my son and not take any risks.

     

     

    #38695 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    Her family is not “everyone”.

    It is inevitable that they will take her side. Remember that no-one really knows what goes on in a marriage except the two people in it, so they may have a very different view.

    If you honestly believe you are doing the best for your child then stick with it until the next hearing. The drug test will show whether the report was true or not and then you/the court can act as appropriate.

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