Pregnant & left by Narc partner

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This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  mstime 3 weeks, 5 days ago.

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  • #34652 Report

    Laylah43
    Participant

    so a bit of a long one. I got pregnant to my ex partner a few months into the relationship. Neither of us using protection and both said if it happened it happened. I was happy for it to and he gave the same impression to family and friends. As soon as I became pregnant he became a completely different person. Showed a narc personality. Constantly putting me down and threatening me when there was an argument. Whenever an argument happened he decided he didn’t want the baby and as soon as the arguments were over he wanted the baby and “only said it to get to me”. After one really bad argument, I agreed for an abortion after been bullied into it by him because I was sick of the threats and how he was treating me. He then decided to call me a baby killer etc. So I decided against it because it wasn’t what I wanted. He kept saying I trapped him etc even though we both knew pregnancy was going to happen. I have always said he didn’t have to be there if it wasn’t what he wanted. Long story short we’ve now been split a few months. One minute he wants to be there when our baby enters the world, the next ive trapped him and he wants nothing to do with baby. He has excuse after excuse to why he hasn’t bought baby anything at all so far. He told me he didn’t want to be at the birth and then when I said that was fine he decided he did. My guess he’s just playing games? Anyway I’ve decided not to let him at the birth as he hasn’t made effort to go to any scans even ask how pregnancy is since been split and everything turns into an argument with him. I’m fully expecting to be the ‘bad guy’ when he isn’t at birth even though he is showing no interest. In terms of him seeing baby IF he decides to be involved I’ve been warned by his family that he will be inconsistent and I’m not sure how to handle the situation if he is as I have always said if he is in baby’s life he is consistent. Is this something I can manage  and how can I put my foot down before it starts?

    #34658 Report

    mstime
    Participant

    Hi

    His behaviour does seem a little erratic to say the least. Possibly even signs of narcissistic stuff going on.  You know him well enough so if you believe that hes playing games then he is. Mind games.

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