Police caution and child access
23 June 2021 at 1:16 am #55577
I already have a court order with my 2yr old daughters dad regarding his access where he was granted to be able to have her twice a week – Wednesday and Sunday overnight.
I really thought we’d turned a corner and things were progressing but sadly after a week of arguing that just built up, it ended with him attacking me and trying to strangle me. The police were called and he now has an official caution on record.
When we first went to court I got legal aid as there had been domestic violence before and now he has done it again. It looks like I will be going back to court regarding our daughter as now there are more safeguarding concerns but as he only has 2days already (he wants 3) i dont know what will or could happen especially in light of the fact he now has a real record of hurting me. Any advice or support I would truly appreciate23 June 2021 at 11:05 am #55581
I’m Michelle one of the Moderators here. I’m sorry to hear about your circumstances, it sounds like things are very difficult for you at the moment. You may have already been in touch with some services already but I’ll paste some links below to agencies that may be able to offer you some support:
Refuge: National Domestic Violence Helpline – Provide specialist support to women, children and some men escaping domestic violence and other forms of violence. Freephone 24-Hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline: 0808 2000 247 or visit http://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk (access live chat Mon-Fri 3-10pm)
Victim Support – Provide free and confidential support 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year for people affected by crime and traumatic events – regardless of whether you have reported the crime to the police. 08 08 16 89 111 https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/
And for legal support:
Rights of Women – Free, confidential legal advice by telephone for women on a wide variety of issues. Specialist areas include family law and domestic violence. https://rightsofwomen.org.uk/get-advice/family-law/
Child Law Advice Service – Provide legal advice on family law issues related to children, they have information on their website, and a helpline staffed by legal specialists 0300 330 5480 https://childlawadvice.org.uk/
Family Rights Group – They advise around options where decisions have been made by the courts or social workers around their children’s welfare 0808 801 0366 https://www.frg.org.uk/
Family Law Panel – A free directory service for members of the public to access professional and independent family law information. Solicitors offer an initial free advice session. N.B. Professionals who can offer support with Domestic Violence are listed with a purple ribbon next to their name. https://thefamilylawpanel.org/categories/1
LawWorks – A charity working in England and Wales to connect volunteer lawyers with people in need of legal advice, who are not eligible for legal aid and cannot afford to pay and with the not-for-profit organisations that support them. https://www.lawworks.org.uk/
Civil Legal Advice Helpline – Find out whether you qualify for legal aid and get details of local family law solicitors that provide advice and representation funded by legal aid 0345 345 4 345 https://www.gov.uk/civil-legal-advice
There’s lots of guidance available via the info pages within the Gingerbread site. Here’s a page with guidance around contact arrangements:
You could also get in touch with the Single Parents Helpline. They have plenty of expetise around issues that effect Single Parents and may be able to offer you some direction with this or provide you details for other services that could help:
Gingerbread Single Parent Helpline – Freephone 0808 802 0925
Opening hours: Mon 10 – 6, Tues 10- 4, Wed 10 – 1 & 5 – 7, Thurs 10 – 4, Fri 10 – 4 They can be busy so callers can expect to wait up to 20 minutes before the call is answered
Lots of information but I hope those links will help a bit
Michelle23 June 2021 at 2:56 pm #55582
if going to court is unavoidable I can see this not going well for your ex with his caution. They might recommend he has supervised contact with child for a while, or take some domestic violence course.23 June 2021 at 3:16 pm #55584
Hello thankyou for your reply.
My ex wants us to continue with the original order we currently have. I’ve managed to buy some time of a week, asked him to just let things calm down a bit which he’s agreed to and I’ve got an appointment with my solicitor to see what they say and go from there.
I don’t just want to continue the order because I don’t want to be accused of not safeguarding the girls. Like he has a caution now but il just hand them over as normal? I want to at least see if anything would possibly change if we do go back to court.
Its very difficult as he is the dad, he is pushing for his rights but he is also violent with a proven record now. Surely I can at least stop him having them overnight and as you say maybe ask that he takes a course or gets an assessment