Paying Maintenance when my daughter is disabled
27 September 2018 at 2:51 pm #16214
Good afternoon, i am a new member and i wonder if any of you could help me?
I am divorced and my daughter lives with her Mother. She is 8 years old and has Downs Syndrome, her mother claims Carers allowance as her full time carer. I have my daughter stay every other weekend and i have her for 2 weeks during school holidays. I have been paying my ex £150 a month for maintenance which i know is slightly below what the CMS advise.
My daughter goes Horse Riding once a week with Riding for the disabled which i have been paying half towards even though i never actually get go and see her ride. I also pay half towards her School uniforms and just about anything else my ex deems i should.
I need to know what i should be paying for as talking to some people they say that as i pay maintenance and don’t have my daughter 50% of the time then i should not be paying for all the extras. My partner and i often buy my daughter clothes as my ex only ever send over one change of clothes. Should she be sending an overnight bag with several changes of clothes depending on the amount of time i have her?
I can’t seem to find anything on any website about how much maintenance a parent should pay if their child has a disability and it is frustrating.27 September 2018 at 3:21 pm #16215
Honestly I don’t understand why you are asking how much you should be paying! You have made a child that has a disability and you are grumbling about how much you should be shelling out?
I didn’t realise that children have a price tag attached to.them. parents with children who are disabled have to pay out more money on bills compared to someone who has a child who is not disabled. The carers allowance is not that much money considering it is a 24 hour job caring for someone who is disabled. It is your choice not to go and watch your daughter horse ride!27 September 2018 at 3:33 pm #16217
My main grumble is that there doesn’t seem to be any information on any site about how much maintenance is expected to be paid for a child with disabilities, i don’t see her Ride as i live half an hour away and i don’t drive.
My daughter having a disability is not the main issue, as i have never made an agreement through a third party as to how much i should pay my ex. what i really need to know is what other parents do with their children, do they just pay the maintenance and assume that this goes on all clothes and food etc or am i expected to pay half of absolutely everything and still provide clothes and food etc?28 September 2018 at 10:12 pm #16267
I have 3 children 2 with disabilities. The ex only pays what he has to legally not morally.
He pays nothing to towards clothes and school trips etc.
You made this child with your ex partner. None of us ever think that our beautiful babies will have disabilities.
Do you know how much carers allowance is? Approx £258 every 4 weeks. This is an insult for everything we do.
Man up and stop thinking of yourself and start thinking about your child.
You say that you have a current partner? Well unless I’m wrong, if your ex went to the Child maintenance people, she could ask for your partners salary, if she has one, to be taken into consideration .
Finally, put yourself in your ex’s shoes. She’s caring for a disabled child!!29 September 2018 at 2:06 am #16271
Why are you asking this? Children do not come with a price tag! You make it seem like you are paying your ex for her and not paying to contribute towards your child. Disgusted with this, my child’s father is same as you only difference is he refuses to pay even a penny towards our child. If a woman had put this post she would have the same response as you have had. It’s disgusting, takes 2 to make a baby!!29 September 2018 at 9:59 am #16282
This man has no shame. He should get on the bus like most proud people would & go see his daughter horse ride!