Partner recently left and I’m pregnant
Tagged: 1!Going through pregnancy alone
14 October 2020 at 3:14 pm #44805
Im 16 weeks pregnant and the babies father has just left me.
I’m struggling emotionally a lot. Fear about finances. And ultimately just want him back, however he says that will never happen.
From day one of knowing we were pregnant he never seemed that interested so I worry he won’t be bothered for the rest of my pregnancy and again when baby arrives.
Im looking for advice on how to cope, help with the mental struggles I’m currently going through, is there anything I should do to prepare myself for bringing a child up alone and also am I daft for wanting him back?!
Thank you!14 October 2020 at 4:27 pm #44809
I’m not surprised it’s certainly something to be mulling over, but the long and short of it is, if they’ve been very absolute and direct you have to take it as that. We can hope they change their minds etc, but we can’t control other people. You will be ok. Your friends / family I’m sure will jump in and support you. If you and the father don’t patch things up, you can meet someone else and be happy again.. The child too. More happy than being in an unhealthy relationship that’s broken. I ruminated for a long time after my split up, I still struggle, it’s natural. The only thing that may heal it is time.. Friends / Family will hopefully help you out over Xmas with items you need. Search Gumtree etc too so you get more bang for your buck x14 October 2020 at 6:16 pm #44814
Thank you for your reply.
I think one of my biggest fears is being alone for the rest of my life now. I know it sounds selfish but I don’t want to be alone. I want to be loved and cared for, but is that going to difficult for another single person to fall in love with someone either pregnant or with a newborn?!
xx14 October 2020 at 8:42 pm #44819
You are worth more than that fool who is giving up his chance at having a beautiful family! He is a coward and immature for leaving you at such an emotional, hormonal, stressful time.
Believe me, your relationship status does not define your worth as a woman and you should NEVER feel ashamed about going it alone. If anything it shows how strong and empowered you are and in future, when you are ready, you will find a partner who understands that and admires you for that courage. Anyone who doesn’t, doesn’t deserve you.
I know you are feeling scared and impossibly depressed right now, I know because I’ve been there myself, I spent the majority of my pregnancy single and moved back in with my parents…It felt like I had thrown everything away and ruined my chances at the happy family I had always dreamed of. I was heartbroken.
I’m still single, my little boy is 6 months, and I have learnt how to cope without a partner very well. It is hard and lonely at times, but if you make sure you have a good support network around you and time for yourself to give yourself some love too, you WONT miss him! Just think about the amount of people who stay in unhappy relationships because they are afraid of being alone, only to feel incredibly lonely and abandoned still?
The love you feel when you cuddle your baby will decimate these unhappy feelings your having now.
Keep going, you’re doing brilliantly,
Lissie16 October 2020 at 12:17 pm #44858
Gina in KentParticipant
you’re not alone. The same has happened to me this summer. I am 15 weeks pregnant and the father is not coming back. Feels devastating and I have the same fears. How will I meet someone, how will I deal with loneliness, how will I cope with the baby, and why must my child miss out on a family life. It’s all overwhelming. I think it helps to reach out. I’m looking for friends and other mothers to share this experience with. We’re stronger if we can be together in it. Ultimately these men who left us will miss out on the most beautiful thing in the world.
You can send me a private message if you’d like to chat.
Take good care of yourself.
Gina16 October 2020 at 2:18 pm #44863
Thank you for your reply.
That’s the biggest bit right now for me, coping alone. The emotional daily rollercoaster I’m going through. Feeling up one minute but then down the next ten!
Yes talking most definitely helps and I would absolutely love to take you up on that!
Hopefully we’ll be able to motivate each other and give each other tips and advice. I think that’s super important!