Partner has left me pregnant and with mortgage to pay for alone

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  • #22224 Report

    Ec123
    Participant

    Hi,

    A couple of weeks ago I was thrown into a situation I never thought I’d be in when my partner left me totally out of the blue, no warning signs.

    Due to his financial situation I had bought a home for us in my name, my money, so he had no ties to it other than he was helping to pay every month. We had finally got ourselves in a comfortable place financially, and had just started to save. All of a sudden I have now been left with a 3 bedroom house, mortgage, bills and a car on finance to pay for alone… While at some point in the near future having to buy everything in preparation for our baby.

    I am 13 weeks pregnant and work full time. I have worked out that after paying all the bills, petrol and food I will have £100 to live off per month. My maternity is rubbish, and is statutory after 3 months. I have tried looking at what I may be entitled to and if I am right, I will have £32 to live off in September… With a baby!

    I want to be able to move on from him and focus on being excited to be a mum but I am so stressed about money. There seems to be no simple solution. I am not in a situation to be able to afford to sell the house but if I rent the house out I will not have a home for myself and my child. I am considering trying to get a lodger as I live very close to the local hospital.

    Has anybody been in any similar situation? Rented a room out? If so, would it affect what I am entitled to? Been left with a house to pay for alone? Anyone know what I am entitled to in this situation?

    Thank you!

    #22225 Report

    Sherinam
    Blocked

    Hi there I am living in our 3 bedroom.house with my little girl . I have been on my own since I was 5 ,months pregnant fortunately I was able to afford to bills . I struggled alot when I was on maternity leave as the mat pay is not much . I was able to buy the property from my ex as it was in his name ..my girl is now 5 years old and we have managed quite well

    I wouldstart renting those rooms and save that money as you will need every penny . There are lots of sites or maybe see if you ask someone to place advert in the staff room.

    You say your partner contributed towards mortgage. Unfortunately this is not good as he is entitled to something from your property . So just be mindful as I know you are very upset . Hopefully you can place an advert and get some rent in.

    Take care

    #22227 Report

    Sheesh
    Participant

    I would suggest using the entitled2 app using various scenarios such as childcare etc to see whether you can get additional support such as tax credits, even if you are on maternity leave you are still classed as employed. Get to know a local childminder as this more helpful should you need emergency childcare cover. Not saying put child immediately in childcare. Also be aware that full time for single people is 16 hours, so try scenarios reducing your hours. It may seem strange but the transport costs etc really add up when going to work, plus the housechores and house admin is important too.

    I think there maybe a scheme that is similar to housing benefit, but it helps pay the interest of the mortgage only.

    I would make a financial plan through the money advice service.

    #22230 Report

    Sherinam
    Blocked

    You are better off renting your rooms  for now then when you are due you can decide what benefits there are .  You can’t rent and get benefits at same time . I did  not rent because I was able to afford the mortgage when I went back to.woek.hmrc contributed towards some of the child care . I know relatives who rented to hospital staff and they were really good lodgers and very respectful. You do not get much on benefits so do not go down this route .try and over pay on your mortgage if you can. Get in contact with council as you can get single person discounts before you rent .

    #22243 Report

    dazuk
    Participant

    Hello Ezee123….i know i have spelt that wrong but you reminded me of Ezze E from NWA ! …..On a serious level, if you have a place with rooms you can rent….do it !….and stop worrying…..a MASSIVE WORD OF WARNING…..ONLY RENT TO FEMALES…men are pigs…all of us are shit bags ! …..god bless you EzeeE……fight the powers that be !……

    #22258 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    Agree with Anonymous, this is not too bad. If you economise now, do packed lunches, cut back on everything not essential, you should cope fine. Baby stuff is very inexpensive & most available second hand from NCT sales. I saved up for my maternity leave and found I didn’t need it all because lifestyle changes so much. Less petrol, no gym, no alcohol, few nights out. no work clothes

    As long as you can afford the nursery fees to go back to work, you’ll be fine.

    #22260 Report

    Mil1lion
    Participant

    Facebook is great for second hand baby stuff, I’ve barely bought anything new and that was when my husband was still around… babies dont need flash things and hundreds of cute outfits, they need their mummy, something warm to wear and somewhere safe to sleep…

    Is there a baby basics charity nearby? They are great too

    X

     

    #57427 Report

    syahrulmam
    Participant

    Damn, I just need to take out a loan right now, I don’t know what to do, since I have a debt

    #57448 Report

    Gingerbread Alex
    Moderator

    Hi syahrulmam, you may find the following information on our website helpful about dealing with debt:

    Best wishes,

    Alex

    #57529 Report

    syahrulmam
    Participant

    Ohh, it’s so much more than ugly and shameful what your partner did. Especially since you’re pregnant and you don’t have that working capacity. Right would be for him to manage everything and pay off the mortgage. I don’t know what you could do in this case. You can’t learn and it will be very difficult for you. I advise you to address to yhdistalaina.com, they will study your case very well and will advise you where to borrow a loan to how to earn some money to cover that debt that now creates problems for your head. I am sincerely sorry for your situation and I am sure that you are a person who would not deserve such a hanging, for this reason and I wish you all the best

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