Hi. I’m a single dad of a 3 year old. Separated from my ex about to be formally divorced. We have reached official financial settlement.
I am an active/involved Dad. I have him 2 nights a week and alternate long weekends plus as hoc contact on top of this. Though my ex is not my favourite person and we sadly have a toxic relationship we have managed to keep this arrangement going.
However, she does use my son as a bargaining tool and at any moment she can and has changed the arrangements. She refuses to agree a long term plan for holidays or Xmas/Easter etc. It is a control thing and extremely limiting never to be able to plan more then a week in advance.
I need some certainty to enable me (all of us) to build our lives again.
How do I get a child arrangement or plan agreed with her? She will never agree with me even if I am asking for logical and reasonable arrangements to be codified. I think I start with mediation. I also can’t afford a lengthy court battle as I’ve given her the house (for my sons benifit) and most of my money so I’m starting with nothing really.
Just don’t know where to start. Please offer some advice? I want to have 50/50 care. It’s almost that and agree how we do the other stuff. I don’t want to claim she’s a bad mother or accuse her of anything. I just want us to look after our son the best we can and give him two loving stable homes.