Very interesting listen.
im surprised Steve thinks only men are affected this can affect any parent.
personally, I didn’t see my dad from the age of 7 (my choice) and saw him again when I was 17, after all the contact method explained in the report after I turned 16. he then tried to turn me against my mum. thinking I had no memory of his awful behaviour towards me. My mum never told me anything about his abusive behaviour until I was 20. By that time I’d witnessed it for myself.
I found that really hard to stomach, my mum didn’t bad mouth him, try and stop me, but let me walk back into his life unawares and it destroyed me a little.
I do wonder if she’s been more honest with me (which, could have been deemed as her alienating him) if I’d have been better prepared for his abusive behaviour.
It’s a very complex topic and every parent should be honest with their children but at the same time not cross the line.
unfortunately, I’m an example in the report I had a child with the mirror image of my biological father and it scares the life out of me that when they meet again, he’ll try to alienate me.
I’m honest with my child, still very young, so age appropriate but I will not lie and let her walk into the same trap I did. I won’t alienate him, But prepare her for that meet.
It’s such a complex topic and can happen to any parent when the child is almost an adult
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