I am facing the prospect of my relationship breaking down during the pregnancy of my first child. Emotions are running incredibly high and lots of damage has already been done. We are both panicking about what the other will do when the baby is born. I still want to resolve things but don’t know how and our family is fractured.
As the father of our baby I am overwhelmed with the prospect of missing out on the babies development, the birth and the thought of not being a day to day dad which is what I have always dreamed of.
I have stumbled over this forum, can anyone give reassurance? Guidance? Or direct to any resources that can help.
try not to think of the worst. I sense both of you are extremely emotional during this time. try to let things calm down. I would suggest either now or after birth of child, both of you seek couples counselling. can message me if you like. have been single dad for nearly 3 years.
Mediation can help. But letting things calm down as well as connecting with other single dads is a good idea and seeing what things are around in the community to go to so you can chat with other parents and the baby can do different things like swimming which is great for bonding with your child,or just go to a play groups. They can be quite overwhelming at first but the volunteers are there for advice and put you at ease as a new parent.
The best thing in my opinion is to step back and keep it civil she needs to be calm for the baby’s sake if you can do this this it would show to her that you care about the baby as a single mum who went through termoil from the father shortly before giving birth it made me think he didn’t care ( he didn’t) still doesn’t otherwise he would not be stressing me out in turn putting baby at risk my situation was alot different though but it’s still shows you care regardless x
You don’t need to apologize to anyone for sounding desperate.Desperate times call for desperate measures.
There’s so many things you can help with if you want to get into her good books so to speak.I don’t know anything about your situation but it sounded from your post like your relationship is still hanging by a thread which is better than nothing. You also say you want to resolve it.She might be a bit hormonal or exhausted.Try not to take what she says too personally or it will just blow up out of control & she might lock you out of her life.You sound like you really care and would be a good dad…offer your help with whatever it is that needs doing/buying/carry/fetching/sorting.Show her you really do care.Sometimes we feel or think a whole load of stuff but don’t tell the other person, so they just don’t know.
Also can you get some advice from a professional?
It can be helpful to hear from a neutral 3rd party who’s not embroiled.It would be horrible for things to fall apart b4 your baby’s even born.Good luck,I hope you get the help you are looking for and it’s resolved the way you want.
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