Hello, my first post here, but I’m hoping some of you will have experienced this. I’ve been single now for a few years, and it’s a daily challenge (!), but the thing that’s pushing me over the edge just now is mealtimes, I have 3 older teenage boys, aged 16-19. They’re good kids, but mealtimes are just torture. It’s difficult to get them all off their devices to even come to the table and when they do they mostly just sit in silence, gulp the food and leave. Smetimes someone is up for a chat, and it’s really lovely, but usually I’m there like an idiot trying to make conversation, and no one’s joining in. Tonight I’d done a nice roast and they just sat there with faces tripping them, I’m hurt as I’ve put a bit of effort into dinner (though it’s the same even if it’s just something out the freezer), so tonight I decided not not try to make conversation, let’s see what happens.. Nothing!! I did mention a couple of things, but basically we sat there in silence, cutlery clanking…. ouch! They did mumble thanks when they l eft, but I could have cried. And this happens a lot.
My question is – is this common? I feel if there was another adult we could at least model polite conversation (in theory,….I do know it can go the other way!). They’re old enough that they should be able to make an effort at conversation. It’s not that they can’t, they just can’t be bothered. Does anyone have some strategies? Should I just give in and have dinner in front of the TV? It’s just occasionally we do chat and itls really nice. I imagine all these perfect families discussing their days etc…. and our dinner is just tumbleweed time. They’ll all be leaving home soon and these “family” times together feel quite precious. Help please!!