No friends single mum starting to go insane feeling like a faliure

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  • #16914 Report

    hollybobs
    Participant

    Hi everyone im a single mom to a 4 year old girl and have no friends what so ever, I work part time but work alone. I hardly have any adult contact unless its by phone in work but thats work related. Daughter has started school and is making friends but im starting to feel like a failure no play dates or friends over I dont have anyone the phone book in my phone is empty, If i died tomorrow  noone would be at my funeral its been this way for a few years but now its really starting to get me down. Im at a loss with what to do how can you make friends in your 30s. Is the something wrong with me or are other people the same but its just never spoken about.

    #16917 Report

    DanLC89
    Participant

    I would recommend looking at local clubs your daughter may be interested in. It would give her something to look forward to, and you could use it as a chance to interact with other parents and make some friends of your own. Just don’t be the type to sit there and look at the phone while your daughter is having fun. Join in when you are allowed, and talk to others when you can.

    A lot of clubs go through schools, so you could ask the school for help in finding clubs too.

    Hope this helps.

    #16919 Report

    Westernchampion
    Participant

    Hi hollybobs, is agree with the last post. Birthday party invites will hopefully happen now she is at school. Also do you have family close by. I know what it’s like not to have any friends but I am always happy to chat with you on here.

    #16927 Report

    R09
    Participant

    Really feel for you .. it can be very isolating as a single mum and I’m pretty certain you are not a failure 🙂    Have you tried any of the Facebook groups to find mums in your area with similar age children ?  There’s some really good ones and I see so many posts of women saying they’re in the same boat with no friends and desperate to have a ‘grown up’ to talk to .  This is one:  https://www.facebook.com/pg/mummysocial  There’s another group but there are also ‘mummy meet up’ groups local to most areas.  Good luck x

    #16936 Report

    Sparky
    Participant

    Morning hollybobs

    i can relate, as I’m sure a lot of people on here can. I work pretty much full time but a lot of it from home so unless it’s school run, days can go by and I’ll not see anyone. My daughter is 7 and goes to her dads half the weekend so I’ll see even less people then. I have a few friends nearby but all have families/other half’s that work shifts etc so getting together is like a military event! I’ve no family here either so quite literally do everything myself. Most of the friends/people I know are all through my daughter as I’m not from this area (I’m in West Yorkshire, where are you?) so trust me when I tell you I know how isolating it is. I’ve tried the Facebook groups tho must admit I’m not really a fan of social media, so it’s probably more on me that they’ve not worked out lol. I’d love some friends that get what life is like. Feel free to message me, I know it’s not the same as an actual person but sometimes it’s way better than nothing, geography is a kicker at times 😊 x

    #16983 Report

    Poppy
    Member

    Hi there Hollybobs,

    Thanks for your message and for sharing this with our amazing community of single parents.

    It sounds like you’re under a lot of stress and things are really hard right now – we hear you and you aren’t alone. We want you to know that we think you’re brilliant, not a failure. Being a single parent can be very rewarding but it can be very tough and it’s so important you get the advice and help you need to get you through the ups and downs. Experiencing isolation and loneliness it totally normal but you deserve to be safe, well and supported. Just to let you know, we’ve dropped you a little message with some things that may help. Have a look when you get some time and take care of yourself.

    Poppy at Gingerbread

    #16994 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    Hi Holly, that sounds fairly standard. I’m a single mum of one and I work full time. Outside of work, I have few friends because they want to go partying and my ex will only look after our son 10-6 on Sundays.

    Depending on what cover you have, maybe think about doing park run – an hour on a Saturday morning – it’s easy to meet people, we’re there wheezing along at the back, 😊 and the exercise starts the weekend off on a more cheerful note. Don’t worry about running 5k, it took me a year to manage that.

    plus most schools do cake sales now, so offer to make the occasional lemon drizzle and they will be thrilled to see you. Or you could ring the school and offer to help the little ones with reading practice. That’s a good way in too.

    It does get easier.

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