No Family at all and hardly any friends
7 August 2019 at 7:20 am #28892
Hi, I’m new to this..
I don’t want to go into too much detail but I have no family at all (they are all aboard).
i live in south london, I’m a mom to 3 children ( all under 6). How and where do I get support from.
Does anyone know about groups I could join for people in my situation (having a lack of family support or non at all)
Please someone help7 August 2019 at 7:29 am #28893
Unfortunately, I’m not in your area so I’m sorry but I can’t recommend anywhere specific to you but i really wanted you to know that I hear you. I am also wondering if you have a children’s centre still in your area. I have one in mine and they offer groups for children under 5, advice on specific child related issues and space to talk. I’m just wondering if that’d be a good starting point?
Hope you’re ok.7 August 2019 at 7:51 am #28894
Do you have Family Information Service in your area?
Some of the church groups tend to run playgroups etc. Some even run very cheap holiday clubs for the older kids.
Netmums also has a forum where you can ask or reply to other mums looking to make friends, arrange playdates, or maybe just email.
Have you checked to see if there is a local gingerbread group in your area?7 August 2019 at 8:51 am #28896
thank you for the advise. I’m in contact with my children centre and they are helping where they can but have limited things to do
i am also suffering from depression and anxiety- which makes it so difficult for me to deal with people face to face. I want to lock myself away but I want and know I need to socialise. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know how to interact. This just makes it hard for me to really go out.
thank you so much for caring and advising.
thank you for replying
I will have to check but I haven’t noticed any church services nearby- will have to see what is available
I think I will definitely give Netmum a try
also there is a gingerbread service in my area- I have made contact but no one has got back to me and I’m not even sure if they are even still active7 August 2019 at 8:51 am #28897
Thank you for the suggests- really appreciate it7 August 2019 at 9:22 am #28898
You’re welcome, and thank you for sharing. I’m sorry to hear things are so challenging at the moment and wondered if it’d be helpful to visit your GP who might be able to offer some support for your mood at present? If appropriate, they might also be able to refer you to your local MIND charity who I know in my area offer befriending services. Bare with me on this – I’m wondering if a befriender could offer you some support to attend some of these groups you’d be put in touch with/you find as I hear that’s currently a challenge??? Its just a thought I’ve just had – hope you don’t mind my suggesting.
You take care and be kind to yourself – you are doing an amazing job in difficult circumstances.7 August 2019 at 12:16 pm #28907
Have you checked your local council web site. Most London Boroughs arrange groups & activities during the school holidays and beyond, which help with introductions.
Also try your local library who normally have lots of information. And agree with the person who suggested talking to the receptionist at your doctor’s surgery.7 August 2019 at 7:38 pm #28931
I have an appointment book with my doctors the moods, hopefully he can suggest or like you said refer me somewhere.
I feel like I’m in so much need right now and fully aware of the support I need mentally and emotionally- so no offence taken at all. Right now I will try any and everything to over come these feelings.
I also have a lot of emotional baggage from childhood traumas- which I never really faced but I literally have no choice bout to face them and I actually want to- after many and many years of rejecting counselling/therapy. Then the trauma of having children at a very young age with a controlling and extremely abusive older man.
It’s like I am an adult now and all the trauma is coming to the surface and I can’t run anymore- I don’t actually want to either.
I have to do CBT workshops and then extensive therapy following (I would imagine this is going to take years)
Apologises if that’s too much- just needed to get that out7 August 2019 at 7:45 pm #28932
thank you the suggestions, definitely will look into all of that
I used to take my first two to the library during the holidays
I was thinking more support for myself more than anything
thank you again for your support and suggestion7 August 2019 at 7:59 pm #28933
You are incredibly brave. I hope your appointment goes well and you recieve the support you need. You have been through so much but you are strong and will work through it, with the support.
Take care of yourself.7 August 2019 at 9:31 pm #28938
Since having children, I’m also having therapy and dealing with some of my childhood traumas. It’s actually one of the best things that I’ve done. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through all this.
To help you get out and about in your area, there is an app called Hoop which has all local activities (some free. You can filter this) you can do with your children.
Sorry if you alreadg know this.
Sending positive vibes.8 August 2019 at 4:00 am #28944
Thank you for replying; that is so reassuring to hear! Well done it takes a lot to do that. Really happy for you
if you don’t mind me asking.. what type of therapy and how long for?
And Thanks for the Hoops suggestion; will look into it8 August 2019 at 10:16 am #28955
Ruby – moderatorParticipant
You might be interested to look up the Gingerbread Friendship Groups, these are groups of single parents in similar circumstances who get together. You can find your closest group and read more about them here – https://www.gingerbread.org.uk/community/single-parent-groups/
I hope this helps.8 August 2019 at 8:15 pm #29006
I’ve been having weekly sessions since January I’m doing psychotherapy with mindfulness. Good luck with your journey