New single mum!

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  • #12064 Report

    Laurafred18
    Participant

    hey everyone

    I have just left my partner of 4 years, we have a 2 year old son together. I’m struggling to come to terms with it all, I love him so so much! But I know I needed out of that relationship. I have left with no income, no savings, no car. I have great family support but just don’t know what to do next!! Help!

    #12065 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    So where are you living? Did you part-own the house/flat?

    #12067 Report

    Abbeydad
    Participant

    steps I would take.

    Child Maintenance if he has income and can contribute,

    Claim Benefits, tax credits, child etc…

    get a part time job, something you enjoy because of social aspect it will give your mind something to do, while your heart is healing.

    do you have debts ? do you need to drive for school ? how close are you to shops etc…

    do you have friends to socialise with, this is what I’ve been missing out on, so that’s while I’m here on the forum.

     

    #12074 Report

    Laurafred18
    Participant

    Thanks for your reply!

    I gave up my career for his because he was the higher earner. But have been in the process of getting back to work.

    I have no debts. But will need to sort a car to get around. My son is only 2 so not in school yet but need a car to get him to his childminder.

    Iv moved in with my sister. And I have been dropping her to work and using her car during the day.

    I have great family support and good friends, although a lot of them don’t live close by anymore.

    Its hard, even though I have good support,  it’s still him I want the support to be from!

    I am going to organise a meeting with citizens advice today and try focus on myself and my son.

    #12113 Report

    SarahJT
    Participant

    Hi Laura,

    Hope you’re doing ok. I would agree get part time work then you can still get tax credits and child benefit.

    If you can get out to any groups to do what you enjoy that would be good too. I still manage to go to my travel group. I cant go to the walking group I went to before but I get out with her for lots of walks. Also play groups at churches are good and the people friendly- there’s no obligation to go to a service.

    Sarah x

    #12115 Report

    Abbeydad
    Participant

    Here’s the Child Maintenance Calculator and Helpline <span style=”color: #0b0c0c; font-family: nta, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 19px;”> 0800 171 2033</span>
    https://www.cmoptions.org/en/calculator/calculator.asp

    and the tax credits helpline number is <span style=”color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 32px;”>0345 300 3900</span>
    and website https://www.gov.uk/child-tax-credit/new-claim
    you may be in a universal tax credit area, you can find out on the above link.

    you can talk to them first they are friendly and want to help,  say you want to make an application, make a list of all details you need, then get together before going online.

    #12166 Report

    Stacey
    Participant

    Hi Laura,

    I’m a single mom of a two year old with no car. I used to work in administrative jobs within the financial services sector but when my partner and I split up I decided to stay home with my son. Income support gives me hardly anything to live on after rent and basic expenses but I stay on it because I qualify for free prescriptions and legal aid. But I don’t think you can get income support if you work more than 16 hours a week. And I think they are trying to phase income support out now anyways with the whole Universal Credit thing. Your message struck me because it is hard to be a single mom without a car. I’ve started to ride my bike again but I do worry about what would happen to me if I got hit by a car or crashed. But I don’t have many other options at the moment. Also I wanted to say getting an Amazon Prime Membership really helped me because I can order lots of heavy groceries and get them delivered to my door (although the carrier always complains!). And you can stream movies because because freeview gets really boring. I hope that things go well for you. I’m sure once everything settles down you will be proud of yourself for providing your son with a loving home. Good for you for reaching out to others so soon. All the best. Stacey

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