Need some advice

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  • #39522 Report


    Hello, me and my ex broke up two years ago, since then he has put me through hell and back. He has tried to sell our family home from under us, and still is, we were not married. I’ve racked up such large solicitors bills trying to fight him. All started since he met new girlfriend, kids are 3 & 5.

    He has not spent a penny regarding children arrangements though, we agreed every other weekend and a Thursday night every week .

    That was all fine until the coronavirus lockdown, we are both working. He is having the children from 8am on a Thursday now instead of 4pm. But for the last 2 weeks he’s not had the kids at the weekend, just Thursdays. I think he should be doing more, I suggested he has them Thursday 8am – Sunday 12pm, every week. So a fair 50/50 split. He says no it doesn’t work for him. I’m exhausted, mentally and physically and could really do with some consistent time.

    The children are at a very challenging age, but there is 2 of them and 1 of me. It is very different having a plan of every other weekend when there is normality of being able to get out of the house and see friends and family but it’s not working for the children or me right now.

    Where do I stand?

    If he tries to bring them back tomorrow and I’m not there would I get in trouble? I really feel like doing it and just saying I’m sorry but it doesnt suit me this weekend, like he does to me.

    We do not have a court order in place. He is extremely controlling and will only settle for his own way.

    When he thought it would make the house sold he pushed for a 50/50 split, I refused as it would be a 60 mile round trip from his place of residence to the children’s school. But now he gets the opportunity he’s refusing.

    Thanks if you made it this far! X



    #39558 Report


    Hi. I’m sorry I don’t have any legal advice for you as to what you can do but you certainly could do with a bit of support. My ex hasn’t seen the children since lockdown and it seems like it’s a perfect excuse for him not to bother. My children are all teenagers so they can almost look after themselves, it would be different if they were younger and more demanding. This is a really difficult time for single parents. Could you ask a family member to talk to him about it? I hope you can get something sorted that works for both of you.

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