My partner has left me

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  • #62543 Report

    Flowerpower123
    Participant

    My partner of 36yrs has left me to hook up with an old flame he hardly new from 30yrs ago, apparently they haven’t seen each other in all that time & she messaged him out of the blue on Facebook a couple of weeks ago, he didn’t tell me his intentions I caught him out by chance by finding out he was using another phone… Apparently they haven’t even met up yet just exchanged messages but he’s decided we are finished & wants to pursue things with her, I’m utterly devastated & at a loss to how to cope will all these feelings, I simply can’t believe he would make such a decision so hastily when he’s never seen her in all these years… Any words of advice anyone?

    #62559 Report

    sirtobi
    Participant

    Hello Flowerpower123,

    sorry for the state of affairs you are in. I hope you are coping. After 36 years, you would think there is a little more substance when leaving. So you might have a good fighting chance if you try to collect yourself and find out, what his actual reasons are. You have spent two thirds of your life together. So there might be something in the way that seems unsurmountable for him, and he has given up trying. If it has reached a stage where he has used a second phone and actually went to some length to conceal his deeds, I think there must be more than just this other woman to motivate him. I wouldn’t give up just yet. I would think about what could have triggered it and see what I could change and how I could find common ground again. If that fails, there is still time to draw a line in the sand.

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