My child lives with her dad !

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This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  SOLOMUMMY 3 weeks, 6 days ago.

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  • #31814 Report

    JJoules
    Participant

    My daughter has Autism diagnoses and her father is in complete denial !   It took me 5 years to get this done & privately too in the end through help.  I never gave up on her.

    she lives with her father due to the attacks on myself & her teenage sister ( from another partner ).   He gives into my child’s demands , no boundaries gets away with everything . Anything for an easy life!
    now it’s in family court &  after 3 cases my daughter is being put under 14 week’s assessment with a psychiatrist for a full assessment just to give father a second opinion.     He has threatened me to make me pull out of the case and if not he’s coming for child maintenance off me!    Am hardly working on universal credit.   My daughter won’t stay the night no more because of anxiety but I want her too.  She comes every fortnight for one whole day and we always do fun stuff together & one evening after school.   The court has granted her to make her own decision about staying the night as it causes distress.   Her father lets her fall asleep to her I pad which I don’t agree with ,  he use to lay with her until she’s falls asleep for thew years .    She demands she sleep in my bed when she stays with the lamp on .  She’s nearly 10 and this is not on now .  I have done everything possible to get her to sleep in her bed but unfortunately he breaks all my hard work !    So you see mummy is the bad egg at night time.  So she will not sleep at mine . Now her dad is not happy about no more night sleeps at mine that he is coming for maintenance from me .  I hardly have enough to survive on now which has led me suicidal, my parents are helping me out & I have another child to support .
    I had problems with work due to his behaviours towards me and ill health through his stress on me .   I feel abused by him on top of the fact I was devastated that my child’s behaviour was caused by his lack of parenting skills!     I feel if CM takes money off me I will not be able to have my daughter no more on a weekend as I will never be able to take her out or afford anthing as I can’t pay her dad and take her out .     It’s going to destroy us both .  If am forced to pay I will loose my rental home .  My own 17 yr old payed for my cars mot and work recently from her weekend job wages until I payed her back.    How bad is this for my other daughter.  my child’s father does this to a mum that try’s hard to have a relationship with her.  He is pure evil to me .

    #31862 Report

    SOLOMUMMY
    Participant

    Child maintenance is I’m afraid something that you should be contributing towards.

    Your income from work and benefits will be taken into consideration.

    If you have dependent children this would also be considered.

    You should be more than able to spend time with your own child without spending copious amounts of money, given you see her four evenings and two days a month. And maybe the bigger issue here is that you feel you need to spend money to entertain her rather than spending quality time with her as the focus.

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